[QUOTE=I’m Ron Burgundy?]
I’m 22 and I feel like there’s absolutely nothing new or interesting in the world. I live in a small college town with my med student SO of 3 years. It seems like the only things to do here are go shopping and get drunk, and I don’t drink. I’ve been here a year now and I haven’t made any friends. I’m not talkative, really; I talk about things I’m interested in but I don’t like talking if the other person doesn’t seem interested,and I’m not good at knowing what to say or starting up a conversation.
Most people are older than me, the town is kind of a detached suburb, lots of elderly people and folks with families. The nearest city is 90 minutes away. Pretty much all I do with my SO is go out to eat, watch movies and go to the stores.
I like writing and recording music, and I’ve learned a lot on audio engineering on my own in the past year, and learned to play the drums last few months, but I haven’t found anyone like-minded. I get angry and frustrated a lot more easily. I’ve lived in bigger cities, so I never really felt like I lived in Texas - the one people make jokes about, the one that votes Republican.
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Many people around your age go through experiences similar to what you’re experiencing. Now I want to refrain from jumping to conclusions, so let me offer some questions and suggestions that might get you on a more solid footing.
While in college, most people mentally form a plan for how the rest of their life will go. Some make a detailed plan, others a more vague one. Typically the plan will address how their career and family life will unfold, and possibly other things. Did you have such a plan? If so, are you starting to question it, or to see that things aren’t unfolding the way you expected?
You said that your SO is a medical student, but you didn’t mention whether you’re working or still in school. I assume that a 22-year-old is working their first full-time job after college, though similar questions might apply if you’ve gone into grad school. Is your job turning out differently than you expected? Do you have trouble relating to coworkers? Do you have some ideals, which you’ve found that you can’t uphold at this job? Do you get angry at your boss, the rules, the bureaucracy? Do you find it, contrary to expectation, boring?
You’ve written a little bit about your troubles with starting conversations. Do you have emotional difficulty with conversation? Does conversation seem superficial? Do the people around you seem superficial? Do you want deeper conversations–and a correspondingly deeper relationship–but don’t know how to create them?
Do you spend a lot of time brooding over unimportant things that other people say or do?
Do you think about the state of the world, and your own insignificance in it? Is this what makes you angry and frustrated?
Have you considered changing jobs, or making some other big life decision? Is there something you really want to do, such as traveling, which your current situation doesn’t allow? Would you like to devote more time to your music?
Like I said, I’ve been there and so have many other people. I have some suggestions that you might find helpful, but first I’d like to know if I’m shooting in the right general direction.