So you want to be an unholy lesbian vampire

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

Like Rasa, I’m more of an unholy bisexual creature. (Also, we both hail from RI. Hi Rasa!)

I’m not a vampire, but my sisters swear my father is… he never eats during the day AND he stays up all night… Perhaps I’m half vampire…

As for being either in the army or being a night person, weeelllll, not so much. In fact, I’m a really perky morning person. But I AM unholy: I’m a recovering Catholic. (That must count for something.)

So if that doesn’t violate the spirit of the ULVAN, I’m in! I’d be happy to serve as a liaison to the Unholy Lesbian Vampire Girl Scouts of the Late Afternoon. As a troop leader, even. (My ex-GF, who I met when we were both counselors at Girl Scout camp, would undoubtedly approve!)

42

Right. So all applications thus far will be accepted providing a satisfactory answer to the following question:

What is the best way to seduce a nubile virgin?

43

Um I’m afraid I don’t know that since… well… looks around carefully I am a virgin… I dunno about nubile though… they would practice on me though if that’s alright with andygirl

44

Slowly…

45

Umm that’s supposed to be could not would… typo there… or maybe my brain was moving opposite my fingers

46
  1. more or less
  2. I wouldn’t have thought so, but the Magic 8 Ball declared that I was one the other night, and who can argue with that? (I s’pose that accepting a Magic 8 Ball’s decree on my sex life adds to #1 . . . )
  3. well, no.
  4. Army brat, if not in myself . . .
  5. but of course.

and, of course, with equal parts of flattery, debauchary, and caution . . .

47

Requirements:

  1. Be unholy - I’m not terribly religious…
  2. Be lesbian - Everyone THINKS I am, is that ok?
  3. Be a vampire - Every second tuesday night, baby.
  4. Be in an army - Currently, no, but after this, maybe
  5. Be of the night. - Right now? checks watch Yep.

Let me in?

48

Make her (him?) think you just want to be friends. Then move in while s/he is asleep.

49

Okay, I’m unholy, vampiric, and of the night. That’s three out of five! Count me in.

50

Gentle enthusiasm and good food

51

Get her drunk. :smiley:

:: D&R::

52

As a heathen night person and duly-nominated honorary lesbian, I hereby nominate myself for the position of Chief Houseboy, Lube Holder, and Mascot.

53

Carefully. Don’t want to scare her away from the fold! :wink:

54

Don’t you need to sleep with women for that job?

I’m not as unholy as I once was, not a lesbian, prefer my blood congealed, avoided army service, and should be in bed before eleven, but can I still join?

55

Sign me up as a charter member of another affiliate:

The Not-Entirely-Nice Likes-Women-But-Isn’t-One Allergic-To-Blood Crossing Guards of the Middle Afternoon

How lame is that?

56

The best way to seduce a nubile virgin?

Sheesh. I think I used to be one of those a loooooooong time ago. Lemme see if I can remember what happened…

Think, think, think…

Oh yeah! Dinner, then a softly lit room, a comfy bed, and some nice music in the background. Oh, and the parents were gone, too. That’s how it happened to me, anyway.

But if we’re talking about seducing a nubile young male virgin, well, it’s a little less complicated. A simple “hello” usually works for me. :smiley:

57

SPROING! At your service, ma’am!

58

Hey, dropzone…how YOU doin’? :wink:

59

Let’s see if I qualify…

  1. I’ve received 5 of the 7 sacraments in the Catholic Church…guess that’s pretty holy. Buzzz
  2. Well…women are beautiful and everything…but I’m just not willing to give up my big man-hunk o’ Mr. Sunshine. Buzzz
  3. Is there such thing as a diet Coke vampire? Buzzz
  4. I was at the Salvation Army one time…does that count? Buzzz
  5. See user name. Buzzz
    Too bad. Disqualified on all 5 counts. Maybe you could make me your poster girl?
60

i’ve been waiting for a group like this!

1.) i am quite unholy
2.) i am quite a lesbian
3.) i am almost a vampire
4.) my girlfriend is a military brat (close enough by association, right?)
5.) i am most defintely of the night i haven’t seen daylight in 4 days!

can i be a lady in waiting?