Social Skills 101 - what NOT be like.

The BBQ Pit
1

Alright you fishcunt. I tried to deal with you. I put in my nice little help me thread in MPSMIS looking for suggestions about how to deal with you trying to mess with my wedding. I give up.

(see linked thread for background.)

So, last night we’re all out with friends who are in town visiting. Naturally, the wedding is brought up in conversation. After everyone had to spend time ignoring you pointing out, over and over again, how Joe doesn’t want to marry you after 7 years of dating, right in the middle of people saying how happy they are for us, etc, you BUTT IN and say:

“I bet your first husband is happy for you as well.”

YOU BITCH!

I’m widowed. I was widowed NINE YEARS AGO, one month after my wedding. What, did you think I forgot that? Don’t you think I won’t ever really recover? Why thank you, sooooo very much for bringing that up in the middle of something happy. Screw you, I am only 29 years old, I have a whole life to live, I found love again, I am HAPPY, and now you’re NEVER EVER EVER welcome in my home. I don’t care if I’m marrying your boyfriend’s brother. He and I never want to see your face again. You will not be at my wedding, you will not be invited for holidays, you will not even call my house, ever. Get the fuck out of my life, forever.

We fell asleep crying last night because of you and how you’re tearing big gaping holes in his family. He can’t spend time with his brother because you won’t give them any time alone and he can’t stand to be around you. I have no idea why Joe stays with you, but so help me god, I am going to do everything in my power to make sure that he knows that you are not considered by me to be an extension of him, and not welcome, or even invited, to ANYTHING.

I hate you. I don’t think I’ve ever hated anyone as much as I hate you, not even the drunk driver who killed my husband. My life went on without him, and still does, and I can’t see how it going on without YOU is going to cause me any loss of sleep.

The only consolation I’ve had about you in a long time was how you were asked, and not even remotely politely, to go home last night. By everyone. If this isn’t enough of a clue that you’re problematic and need HELP, then, well, please go balcony diving off the largest structure you can find. You’ll be doing everyone a favor.

fuck you again, just for good measure.

2

This bitch needs to die, creamy girl. I would say Joe needs a fucking backbone. Who wants to donate?

3

After reading all that, in a weird way, it’s probably best she said what she did. Sometimes you need a fatal blow (her comment about your first husband) to really do the job. Your future brother in law sounds like my best friend a few years ago. He had a girlfriend who nobody liked, was very possessive, and a downright cruel person. When they finally split up he yelled at all of us for not telling hima bout it sooner. We tried, he just didn’t listen. I hope he discovers this.

I wish you a lifetime of happiness.

4

:eek:

That goes so far beyond the bounds of what is acceptable, until I read this I didn’t think such horribleness was actually possible.

I am in stunned shock. You are totally right to ostracize her.

5

Cripes! Sounds like someone’s in desparate need of a good ole fashioned ass whuppin.

6

You know, if it had been anyone else I might have said that maybe she meant that in a comforting way.

But I read the other thread.

7

Hell, I’m amazed you hadn’t cut her out yet! Now is definitely the time. I know the family politics can be very sticky, especially where in-laws are involved, but for Heaven’s sake, she’s not worth this suffering. She’s a boil on your future in-laws’ ass. Treat her as such.

8

Who asked her to leave, and was it after that comment? Did you make it clear to her that the comment was in the poorest of tastes? (Not that she’d learn, mind you…)

I’m sorry to hear of you past loss, but I’m also happy to hear about your impeding nuptuals. :smiley:

Esprix

9

Bitch be Crazy! Stay away from her. I know her type and they have more mean energy than you have bitch shield.

10

You DID permanently ban her from your house, right?

Take it from me, there’s NOTHING worse than family reunions in which somebody tries to put aside years and years of volcanic, seething hatred in the name of some cake and a bowl of Jello salad.

11

Thanks, all, so far. I’m starting to feel a little better here, but I’m still fuming.

Esprix, here’s a paraphrased transcript of the conversation.

Bagface “I’m sure your first husband…”

-stunned silence from everyone for a second-

-me getting up and walking away from the table-(I had to go the the bathroom and compose myself. I honestly felt like I was punched in the throat immediately after she said that.)

I’m told that she and my fiancee got into a fight, he asked her to leave, she tried to recruit Joe to come along, he said he’d get a ride home, that he wanted to stay and apologize but she needed to go then, she said she’d stay and apologize herself, and our friends (I’m so sorry for them) told her that it probably was best to go (and back and forth), until one of the friends told her to just go the hell home before he drug her out the door. She got up and stomped out of the resturant (fer chrissakes, make a scene please)

Joe apologized profusely for her. I adore Joe and said it wasn’t his position, and the subject could be dropped, that I was fine, the night went on. Not nearly as festive as before, though.

ugh.

Dawojawan, yep. Permanently, forever, etc etc.

12

First of all congragulations on your up coming nuptuals!
Smashed, I have to agree with a previous poster. Seems Joe needs to grow a back bone and tell this chick to take a hike. It would be better for the entire family! She has no other ties with the family besides Joe? If this is so, Joe needs to do some soul searching as well as ‘new-girlfriend’ searching. He should be the one to say that she is putting gaping holes in thier family because she is the one who is lost. Tell him to give her the boot as quickly as possible.Might be a nice little FUCK YOU if it could happen before x-mas! But it will be raunchy anyways. Joe will find another girl friend! Don’t worry about that. Hopefully Joe can be rid of her…

13

At least Joe is seeing this happen before they get married (if they ever do, and I wouldn’t be surprised if this kind of stuff were why they’re not yet). My sister’s mother-in-law was kissy-kissy, but after they got married the truth came out. In a drunken stupor she once told my sister she didn’t know how to raise her kids right. :eek: Now, there are some things you can say to a parent, but telling them they don’t know how to raise their kids (even if it were true, which it most assuredly is not in my sister’s case) is just wrong and, apparently, unforgivable, as my sister hasn’t spoken to her in years (putting her husband in the awkward situation of having to walk a line between them - his wife and his mother - but as their family has grown, he spends more time with his own immediate family, obviously). Of course, it hasn’t helped that the old biddy has never once acknowledged the kids’ (now four of them) birthdays, nor gotten them anything for any holidays, including Christmas. My 5-year-old niece saw her a few months ago and said, “Daddy, who’s that lady?” How sad is that?

Like I said, better y’all see this now - it’d just be worse if they actually did get married.

Esprix

14

You know you can put a bug in Joe ear–that is commonly called scare the crap outta him. Tell him that 7 years is in most states long enough for him to actually be married to his live in girlfriend.

I agree it was time for her to go. She is a sad sad little person. Using your past to cause you pain is not a sign of a healthy individual IMHO.
But I want to know how the wedding plans are going. What are your colors. I love hearing about weddings.

deb

15

Ach, I just posted in your other thread, Smashed Ice Cream, and now I see that this ahem person has been pulling her old tricks again. I’m so sorry that she’s putting your soon-to-be family in this kind of situation, when you should all be happy about your upcoming wedding (especially you and your fiance). I think you are doing absolutely the right thing by cutting her out completely; I hope Joe realizes that he is going to be forced to chose his family or this toxic piece of trash, and he chooses his family. And soon. So none of the rest of you have to deal with her anymore.

Do you think your fiance could sit down with Joe, and lay it out for him? That you won’t be having anything to do with him as long as he’s with her? And give Joe a chance to talk as well; she may be playing all kinds of games with his head to get him to stay with her, and Joe may need his family’s support to get away from her.

16

Well, the good news is that friends like these always trump in-laws like that. Also, the fact that Joe told her to leave and that he’d get his own ride home is a sign that his relationship with Uber-Bitch is headed in the right direction, i.e. soon to be over. Hopefully.

17

Smashed Ice Cream, please accept this as my humble offer to Bitch-Slap this woman with my shoe. No really. I can do amazing things with a sling-back…

Seriously, I feel so awful that this happened to you. This woman is clearly poisonous, rotten, and a low-down stinky, slimy, smelly, snatch. I would happily pop her in the chops for you, however, it sounds like you’re getting some really good family/friend support.

Please take care, and have a super wedding. This woman won’t be there I’m sure, and if she does show up, you now have perfectly just cause to have one of your large, menacing relatives show her to the door.

What a total, monolithic twat!

Al.

18

Wow, Smashed, I didn’t read the earlier thread until now. Take heart, it’s pretty clear that you won’t have to deal with her for too much longer, and she’ll end her life bitter and alone. “Joe” is probably already looking for the exit.

:eek: Well, let’s hope that the impediment is dealt with as expeditiously and unobtrusively as possible. :wink:

19

Oh. My. Gods. What an insufferable clitnugget. What a flaming bag of pus. I cannot believe anyone is so insanely jealous, and so AMAZINGLY small-minded and inconsiderate, that they could say such a thing.

What the HELL does Joe see in her? Is he really that spineless, or does he see some well-hidden good side of her? I mean, is she a good lay or what? I don’t know if anyone should really try to dictate how he lives his life, I mean if he wants to date her interminably that’s his choice, but he’s going to miss out on a lot because of her clingy possessiveness and ultrabitchy ways. He needs to decide if he wants the girlfriend, or a life and friends, because the one will drive away the others.

Pay no attention to the asshole behind the curtain. She is so full of bullshit she moos. Enjoy your upcoming wedding, and your married life, and don’t let that cuntgash ruin your happiness.

20

SIC, I’m going to go the opposite of all the posters here, and say you need to give her a gift. A nice all nautral gift. May I suggest something from this site http://www.sendacrap.com with a note, Thank you for all the s**t you have given me, here is some for you