“Arnie, Arnie, are the children all right?”
“I can’t see through METAL, Kent!”
The Internet King? I wonder if he could provide faster nudity…
Lace: the final brassiere.
Flupid bloroplope.
Last week, some Jehovah’s Witnesses came to the door, and I wouldn’t let them leave. They snuck away when I went into the kitchen to get more lemonade.
Traffic this morning is as bad as it gets. Due to a fire at the Army testing lab, a bunch of escaped infected monkeys are roaming the expressway. Despite the sweltering heat, don’t unroll your windows, 'cause those monkeys seem confused and irritable.
Krusty: Look, uh… about the Ribwich: there aren’t gonna be any more. The animal we made them from is now extinct.
Homer (gasps): The pig?!
Krusty: You’re WAY off. Think smaller… Think more legs.
Also, my Simpsons mental video jukebox produced this quote at once the other day when my 8 year old son said he wished we had (more) canteloupe: “Canteloupe? You’re not missing much. Honeydew is the MONEY melon.”
Nobody in the room got it but me (in fact, my 11 year old daughter piped up that she doesn’t really care for honeydew), but that’s all right. Giggling from having randomly triggered *Simpsons *quotes or clips run through my head is what gets me standing room on the NYC subway.
What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man?
You sound like you’re ready to become your own boss in the exciting world of frame-nudging! Yes, for a minimal franchise fee, you’ll receive a pair of straightening gloves, a canister of wall lubricant, and a booklet of the most commonly asked questions you will hear – including, “Who are you?” and “What are you doing here?”
No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it.
Ah, these Laramie cigarettes give me the steady nerves that I need to combat evil.
Can’t you people take the law into your own hands? I mean, we can’t be policing the entire city!
Skinner: Uh-oh, two Independent Thought Alarms in one day! The children are overstimulated… Willie, remove all the colored chalk from the classrooms!
Groundskeeper Willie: I warned ya! Didn’t I warn ya? That colored chalk was forged by Lucifer himself!
Remember the time he ate my goldfish? And you lied and said I never had goldfish. Then why did I have the bowl, Bart? Why did I have the bowl?
I got nothing against him, but I’m definitely gonna make orphans of his children
I didn’t think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows.
I saw Krabappel’s butt; I paid.
No, no, no, no, no, young man, you need to do some SERIOUS boning!
Come on, Dad, you’ll love New York now that your two least favorite buildings have been obliterated: Old Penn Station and Shea stadium.
Lousy out-dated relics.