My limbic system wants to take your pants off.
Leonard to Sheldon:
Sorry, your movements are so lifelike that I sometimes forget that you’re not a real boy.
Dude, you already have a girlfriend and I called dibs!
I know how she is. She’ll keep having sex with you as long as you buy her stuff.
She’s my friend and you played with her!
I could never bring a white boy home to my parents. They’d have a cow–and that’s a much bigger deal in India.
I’m a gynocologist. I know exactly what she’s giving you.
Given how much time you spend engaging in pointless self-abuse, you might consider, just this once, using your genitalia to actually accomplish something!
I was listening to the conversation going on in my head, and believe me, it was sparkling.
I’m going to need a new dentist now that I know where his hands have been.