Little did they know those devious librul kindergarten teachers had already implemented a curriculum mandating a daily community fellatio regimen for all boys aged 5-8. The initiative, initially called “Let’s turn y’all into gay commie atheists !” will be renamed “Just do it, comrades” following the Senate decision, prompting a sponsorship endorsement from Nike. No details were given regarding the specifics of glue sharing arrangements in effect during the course of this new program.
Now they going to have to teach hetero anal sex with a whole bunch of winking thrown in.
in Tennessee, eh?
Be funny to have the first teacher prosecuted under it be named “Scopes.” 
You guys are a hoot.
Ready for this one?
“Anti-abortion lawmakers in state legislatures around the country have already drawn national attention—and outrage—for pushing bills that would drastically limit access to abortions. But in Louisiana, one “unapologetically pro-life” lawmaker wants to go even further. State Rep. John LaBruzzo, a Republican from Metairie, has introduced a bill that would ban all abortions in his state—with no exceptions for rape, incest, or the life of the mother—and charge women who seek abortions and the doctors who perform those abortions with “feticide.””
I liked this part:
If conservatives ever heard of a legislator introducing bills at the behest of a Muslim religious group, we would never heard the end of it.
Yes, but that’s because hardline Muslims are an horribly backwards international special interests group bent on imposing their law to non-believers and oppressing women, based on ridiculous and regressive stone age myths, all under the banner of the Crescent.
Can’t you see the difference ? They use the wrong symbol, man !
Bwaaaahahahaha! I knew this had to be going somewhere, and this is a thing of beauty. Standing ovation!
It just means they’ll have to teach homosexuality in nursery school.
Or outside the “classrooms” in the traditional way, like back behind the bike sheds.
Stupid Repuiblican idea of the day…Donald Trump.
We need poor, uneducated, abused children to feed our wars against The Others. WHAT DONT YOU GET?!?!?!
Well, that and they’re “international”. Probably means “French”. Eeeww.
-Joe
I tried feticide once. It tasted terrible.
Get the amniotic vinaigrette on the side next time.
**Kansas GOPer: Let’s Shoot Illegal Immigrants Like Pigs
**
Article.
Asked about his comment, Peck was unapologetic. “I was just speaking like a southeast Kansas person,” he said.
Any Dopers here from southeast Kansas who can verify that all southeast Kansans are unthinking, unfeeling racist bastards?
And here’s a good one:
Gun Rights Come From God, Not Constitution, Says Gingrich
Cite.
There are guns in the Bible? In the Book of Colt, maybe? Or is that Uzi, chapter 2, verse 7? Luger 13:56? Give me a break… (I’m pretty sure Jesus mentions divorce once or twice, but Newty conveniently overlooked that little nugget).
And, hey! God gave us slavery, too! It’s definitely in the Bible, but somehow that’s no longer in the Constitution. How very ungodly of us. :rolleyes:
Do people really listen to this buttclown?
Cripes, that guy could do with a one-way ticket to Munchkinland.
And then someone could drop a house on him.
“Blessed are the Peacemakers…”
Matthew 5:9
Peacemaker
Verily.
And lo, Jesus cappedeth that motherknower’s ass. Henceforth, the Lord of Hosts racked His shotgun and verily did he go to town on the moneylenders, fuck yeaheth.
ETA: can you say summer blockbuster ?
Michelle Bachmann, perhaps feeling overshadowed by Teh Donald, used a speech before New Hampshire Republicans to liken tax policy to . . . the Holocaust.
(I just had an epiphany: if you use Roman numerals and squint a lot, you can turn “IRS” into “SS.” Coincidence?)
“Verily shall I waste that melonfarmer, and lo, shall I raise him up from the dead, and kill him again!”
I was born and raised in northeast Kansas, a few hundred miles away, but I still apologize for all the Kansas assclowns. We’re not all unthinking, unfeeling racist bastards.