I wish I could take credit for this one, but it’s from an old Garth Brooks song (“Burning Bridges”):
We’ll cross that bridge whenever it arrives…
Patent your corn early…
The early worm gets the late bird.
I know not what weapons WW IV will be fought,
But WW V will be fought with just stones.
It’s not what you know, but who you have the dirt on.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be: stealing is so much easier.
All’s fair in death and taxes.
You can’t make an omelette without breaking the camel’s back.
That’s no skin off my teeth.
Ine one ear and out for the count.
It’s a dog-eat-dog-tired world.
The more things change, the more they cost.
A ghoul and his money have departed.
It’s as easy as cake.
A load of bread, a jug of wine, and a thousand dollars.
Dont’ lacrimate over a tipped cow…
The world is too much with us, that’s why video games are so beneficial.
It was the best of times. As an optimist I’m stopping the story there.
If all you have is a penis, everything starts to look like a vagina.
A bird in the hand will make your hand dirty.
“If we had but world enough and time,”
We probably still wouldn’t get anything done.
When I consider how my nights are spent
It reminds me to keep my window shades down.
This is the way the whore’ll end
Not with her gang but her pimper.
I wouldn’t miss this for all the tea on Mars.
“The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong - but that’s the way to bet.” - Damon Runyon
You can fool some of the people some of the time, and that’s usually good enough.
The best defense is a good defense.
The early bird gets to beat everyone else to the bathroom.
Elephants never prosper.
A rolling stone gathers a lot of groupies.
Early to bed and early to rise makes you miss Letterman.
Never a borrower nor a lender be unless you get good interest rates.