HOLY SHIT!! LAKJDFALKSJFALSDFJALSDKFJA
Then you’d better post quick before he closes it pre-emptively!
Even after Googling, I still don’t get this.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Fuck her
Why do you put duct tape around a hamster?
So it doesn’t explode when you fuck it
What’s brown and sticky?A stick.
What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper.
Misspost
Why is it that in all the old time movies whenever a woman was about to give birth the doc or midwife or whoever would tell the father to go boil some water?
If it’s born dead they can make soup
Q. On what three occasions does an Italian man see his priest?
A. [ol]
[li]Before his Confirmation.[/li][li]Before his wedding.[/li][li]Before his electrocution.[/li][/ol]
Q. What do you say to a Mexican in a three-piece suit?
A. “Will the defendant please rise?”
Q. What do you call two lawyers thrown off a cliff?
A. A good start
Have you heard about the latest German oven?
It seats six.
Q. Why did Hitler commit suicide?
A. He got the gas bill.
Q. Why are there so many tree-lined roads in Paris?
A. Because the Germans like to march in the shade.
Q. What does AIDS stand for?
A. Anally Inserted Death Sentence
Try Googling"24 Hours from Tulsa"
A priest, a drunk, and a pedophile walk into a bar. Then a second guy walks in.
What’s the difference between Christopher Reeve & OJ Simpson?
OJ walks.
Very offensive: A dyke, a kike and a nigger walk into a bar. The bartender asks “What is this, the Democratic National Convention?”
And they wonder why we aren’t submitting things to Threadspotting.
Ooh, are we doing blonde jokes now?
What does a blonde say after sex?
“You guys all play for the same team?”
Why do blondes wear panties?
To keep their ankles warm.
What does a Jewish girl say after sex?
“The ceiling needs painting.”
How are caviar and Michael Jackson alike?
They both come on little crackers.
what do you do when you are done licking bald pussy?
Pull the diaper up.
How can you tell when a Jewish woman has an orgasm?
She drops her nail file.
How can you tell when an English woman has an orgasm?
She drops her bag of chips.
How do you make a dead baby shake?
Two scoops of ice cream, and two scoops of dead baby.
How can you tell when a French woman has an orgasm?
She drops her baguette.
We could riff on this all day!