I’ll start.

Uh, I wanna cast magic missle!

I will breathe fire on you.

Half of your weapons (of my choice) will turn to slime when I cast my swamp spell.

While I’m fighting you, that is.

I cast Disbelieve, or perhaps Enoble.

How can you cast magic missile? There’s nothing there.

  • KJ casts his Sitting Around Doing Nothing spell

  • Gains 0 HP

  • Does 0 damage

I wanna play a kender!!!

I cast my Bald Toasted Wombat attack, and your underwear bursts into flames.

Gains 14 hit points.

Damage points to be determined after the flames go out.

I roll my 27 sided die. It says you are all swallowed by a lycanthropic half-kobold half-kraken. I have an amulat of immunity.

Tough break.

Just so you know, the beastie is vulnerable to silver and kryptonite.

I am a Druid. I cast the “Tree” spell. Shazam – I am a tree, a beautiful, luxuriant oak! If someone would like to hang an evil thief or two from one of my branches, I would be happy to oblige.


I’m sure I’ve got some of that in one of my pouches…

Okay, everyone roll to Save against Wandering Random Damage.

Oh, and if you check the orcs for grimies, you may find an Amulet of Major Anachronism. Or, you might just find a load of orc spraints.

Here, Rysdad, could you open this for me? The cork seems to be stuck.

No, no, no. You guys have it all wrong. You can’t just go around casting spells! You need organization. That’s why I’m declaring myself the DUNGEON MASTER. HAhahahahaha…your souls are MINE. NO ONE ESCPES!!!
Sorry, got ahead of myself. Anyway, to start off with, you are all in a grove, shaded by Snooooopy’s branches. Suddenly, the required magical-enchanted-elf-type-thingie-guy hops up out of a bush, to give you your quest. You must go to the magical enchanted freeway and hitch a ride to the Necromancer’s bitching keggar in the Black Woods! But, you must also avoid the Troll-cops patrolling the area, as they will cause you to lose half your hitpoints, all your experience points, and any booze that you decided to bring. Good luck!

Sometimes I feel so old. :wink:

Right after you pull my finger.

wonders which system we’re in for rolls - D&D? Gurps? High/low?

shrugs and throws all his dice for a combined roll of 176.5 - hey one was an edge

cuts off a finger, to be pulled at leisure
Sure thing, Rysdad!

I attack the, um, darkness!

I’m attacking the darkness!

Oh, and roll the dice to see if I’m getting drunk!