Or maybe a Stubborn Beauty IPA (which really exists).
Here is the musical version of this (all 3 ‘episodes’ in one, with a nice twist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECmpUJdgm-g
Speaking of chickpeas, do you know the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
You wouldn’y pay $100 to have a lentil on your face.
You know what they say about a man with big feet don’t you?
He needs to buy large shoes
Did you hear that YouTube, Twitter and Facebook are merging into one giant company?
It’ll be called YouTwitFace.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
Elephino. (Hell if I know.)
What has four legs and says “AAAAAAAAA”?
A sheep with no lips.
A doctor is getting ready to write out a prescription for a patient and reaches into his coat pocket for his pen.
Instead, he pulls out a rectal thermometer.
Looking at it, he sighs, annoyed and says “You know what this means? Some asshole’s got my pen.”
What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef!
Me either, which provoked me to do some digging - and I found this: https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/misc.php?do=bbcode.
Seems simple so here goes:
What 14 letter word begins with N, ends with N and means constipation?
NNNNNNNNNNNNNN…
j
Q. How do you catch a unique bird?
A. Unique up on it from behind.
Q. How do you catch a tame bird?
A. The tame way.
How do you put an elephant in the freezer?
Open the door, and walk the elephant in.
How do you put a giraffe in a freezer?
Remove the elephant, and walk the giraffe in.
What did the blonde exclaim when she opened the box of Cheerios?
“Wow! Donut seeds!”
Similar to my favorite joke as a wee one:
What’s grey and lumpy and comes in a can?
Cream of Elephant Soup!
I’m reading a horror book in Braille.
Something bad is going to happen.
I can feel it.