I’ve heard the term “WoW Widow” thrown about quite often. Are there any studies into the psychology behind the phenomenon? Any estimations or hard numbers of relationships effected?
Fuck knows. I remember when the term varied between various online games (e.g. “Air Warrior Widows”) because the phenomenon wasn’t as widely known as it became after the MMORPG craze started.
Lay off, his World Of Warcraft Clan was depending on him!
Oh good, everyone missed that it wasn’t WoW. My ego feels better.
Actually, I’m in between therapists right now. I started going to one because my GP wouldn’t prescribe Prozac unless I started therapy (Was having random urges to play bumper cars in rush hour traffic. Knew enough to get help)
Went well for a few sessions, then she started telling me I had to start a regimen of tapping my forehead while chanting a mantra to get better. May work for some; doesn’t work for me. So I gotta find a new shrink.
Honestly, I started to post this in MPSIMS, but I wanted to be a bit free with the language so I came to the Pit.
Yes, this is me being free with the language. Mock away.
I do ask what he wants… Sometimes I get an answer. We have lace and costumes and oils and things with batteries at his disposal.
It’s just our libidos are not in sync.
And really, saying you’d like sex later is not a turn on? Even with the offer of costumes and oils and such? Who knew.
I am sorry to hear things are going rough. One thing worse than being alone is being *with *someone and feeling alone. Nothing I can say can fix it, but I am sending supporting thoughts your way.
i am a guy, I have the attention span of a gnat. I can’t be expected to read the whole thread when there is a shiny object nearby.
For me it just makes the act seem so weird and scheduled and therefor no longer sexy. The sex I find satisfying is the sex that happens half way through a bad movie, or the sex that interrupts cooking dinner because we were bumping into each other so much in the kitchen.
However, I wouldn’t be happy in a relationship where I wasn’t cooking dinner with my love or watching bad movies. For me, the sex is added on top of the mundane intimacy, not the other way around.
It can be a huge turn on, but it depends on how it’s done. Little teases throughout the day can build anticipation. I’m a firm believer that the best foreplay happens 24/7. Little notes, grab, kiss, and release, a sexy e-mail, things like that. But when it becomes an obligation then all the fun is taken out of it.
Do you guys ever just cuddle? Do you ever make out when there’s no expectation of sex?
A lot better now that I stopped taking Lisinopril. It was apparently inflaming my kidneys causing severe lower back pain. I go to the doc on Thursday.
Unfortunately it appears that most blood pressure reducing drugs are ACE inhibitors.
I was mostly kidding. I do have a son named Andrew (also one named Jacob), we *did *have an overnight sitter and we did go out to eat Saturday night, and after my wife got a few beers in her she decided to dredge up some old arguments from years ago and we argued about them on the way home.
When we got home we tried to watch a movie but she feel asleep (mercifully). Then I played videogames.
If you were my wife, we would have gotten extremely busy. Sex in the FGIE household is rare enough as it is, and it isn’t from a lack of me wanting, it’s her.
If only she could have borrowed your shoes that night…alas…
Maybe he’s still bothered by the affair? He may have thought he was over it but it still gnawed at him over the years so now it’s to the point that he is disgusted by you.
So. I have just HOT to ask the obvious question here…
Are you a troll or a sock?
With a join date of July 2009, enquiring minds want to know.
Neither… I’m a lurker. I’ve been lurking since before chowder publicized his issues with garden gnomes. I was around when we found out Weird Al was a lurker as well.
That’s why I only posted this morning – I had to finalize my registration to be able to post.
Fine.
Thanks for the support. Actually, I expected to get flamed for this. Nobody flames like the SDMB pit crew.
But SDMB also asks the most insightful questions around. So I came here looking for a fresh perspective.
<voice of experience> Have you ruled out a medical condition? Men are WEIRD when it comes to their libido and not necessarily forthcoming. Performance can be affected by heart disease, diabetes, all sorts of things.
Rejection doesn’t feel good no matter what its source. Get back in therapy and get the tools to make good choices. I’m pulling for you.
Cuddling, I can schedule. Usually he watches TV from his recliner. But if I ask, he’ll sit on the couch with me draped across him.
He doesn’t like to do it because it hurts my neck, but sometimes I need the cuddling enough to put up with pain in the neck.
Can she wear a size 7? I’ll send 'em over. (They’re not doing ME any good… Somebody should get laid around here…)
Possible, but I doubt it. We made our peace with that and a lot of other stuff before we started working on little Andrew.
That was also the point of me promising to leave him if it ever got that bad again. It wasn’t a threat – he asked me to promise it. He knows I’ll keep the promise, so he doesn’t have to worry about me making the same stupid mistake again. Beyond weird, I realize, but works for us.
It is absolutely not a turn on. Exactly the opposite. Very much on the opposite side of the “turn on” axis.
That shall be the sum of my participation in this thread.