I thought that was Daniel Boone. Although it was hard to tell, they could have been twins.
Oh, now I got it.
Daniel Boone was a man (he was a big man) but it was Davey Crockett that kilt him a bar when he was only three.
That damn braggart Boone. Not only taking credit for other people’s accomplishments, he was a lousy speller, too. 
No one has a bone to pick with them.
That was much more interesting than the “joke” that started this thread! Thanks for sharing it.
I used the “Donner Party” line the other night when we were on the wait list to be seated for dinner at the restaurant. The rest of my group cracked up but the young lady at the desk was oblivious. I would have thought she heard that line every night but apparently not. When our table was ready she said “Donner, party of five” and one of my friends yelled “Four!”
Nobody else got it. Apparently no students of history were dining that night.
I’d continue this bit but I don’t have the heart.
It was last night’s dinner.
The version I’ve heard ends with the bear looking at his paws befuddled then answering “I dunno. My Dad had 'em?”
A Grasshopper walked into a bar. The barman said ‘Why the big pause’?
The grasshopper replied ‘Oh, yeah, funny. We all look alike to you, don’t we’?
Ching!
And somebody is watching: I’m getting a holiday ad for Lazy Bear ( a polar bear walks into a bar…)
I’m sitting in a coffee shop and two heavy set women sit down at the table next to mine. I couldn’t help but overhear their accent and out of curiosity I asked:
“Are you two ladies from Scotland?”
“That’s Wales, you moron, Wales.”
“Oh sorry, are you two whales from Scotland?”
A limbo contestant walks into a bar. He’s immediately disqualified.
It dawns on me that this might work better if it’s just three people. Perhaps even three drunk people. One has the light up nose, saying they’re Rudolph. The second probably has a makeshift Santa hat (and needs the Ho Ho Ho laugh).
Wouldn’t it have been more convenient for him to have bought some land closer to Princeton? He would have been able to visit it more often.
I like giving my name as “Wild”. It’s easier to pronounce than my real name.
Especially with a big group it’s always nice to have them announce “wild party of 6” and we all stand up and start fake-carousing and grab-assing. 
You want facts this time of year? :smack:
That was worth a smile.
Ah, pedantry.
With a payoff!
What do you call a reindeer with three eyes?
A reiiindeer.
What do you call a blind reindeer? No eye deer.
What do you call a dead blind reindeer? Still no eye deer.
Waht do you call a blind, deaf reindeer with no legs trying to mate?
F***ing still no idea.