Damn, I thought of a twist a little bit late.
A bear walks into a bar and says, “Pour me a beer…please.” The bartender says, “Sure. But what’s with the big pause?”
“I’m taking acting classes from William Shatner.”
A guy walks into a bar and orders a double.
then another double
then another double
Finally the bartender asks “what’s up?”
“Celebrating my first blow job,” said the customer.
“Have another on me then,” the bartender offers.
“No thanks, if the first 3 didn’t get the taste out of my mouth, another won’t help.”
Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar, followed by Batman.
Batman asks the bartender if he’s seen Robin today.
As is traditional, the night after Christmas. Santa’s reindeer went into town for a night of carousing. All but Donner walked into the nearest bar. Donner, meanwhile, went down the street to a place he saw on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives where they serve reindeer.
It’s good, really solid stuff. Just a couple of notes: I don’t think brandy is typically used to polish wood, and maybe the twist could be that the third reindeer wants to have sex with his mother?
Eh, you know, use it or don’t, I don’t care…
Oedipus? Oedipus? I said, “Fesitivus!”
Yeah. You’re right. Idunno.
Dopers are always up for an excuse to mess around. And now he’s given us free rein, dear.
A bear walks up to a bar. The bar says “Hey, watch out for that asshole Crockett.”
I liked the ‘Donner’ one.
Everybody loves a good Donner party.
(Except for Donder, the reindeer, for some reason.)
clap
Good catch there, I thought it may have been misspelled, I still like it. And your addition made me laugh out loud!!
A bear walks into a bar and says, “Pour me a beer…please.” The bartender says, “Why the long face?”
This is my favorite.
Apparently there is a controversy over Dunder, Donder, and Donner. (Somebody make a poll!)
I’ve heard all three though I grew up with “Donner”. The lyrics of* Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer* back me up.
Have you heard the story of how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree?
Long ago, Santa Claus was having his worst Christmas ever. The elves were on strike. The toys he had outsourced to China were of such poor quality, they had to be returned. Rudolph had a sinus infection, and three other reindeer had been arrested for drinking eggnog while driving an unlicensed sleigh. Worst of all, Mrs. Claus had just told Santa that she was having an affair with the Easter Bunny, and she wanted a separation. It was all too much to take, and Santa was so angry that he was about to hit the roof.
At that exact moment, the angel walked into the workshop, carrying the Christmas tree. The angel said: “Hey, Santa! I’ve got the Christmas tree. Where do you want me to stick it?”
…and that’s how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree.
These made me laugh.
Donner always knows how to liven up a party. 
ETA: That’s what I get for not refreshing the page before I post. :o