Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Divorcing

So who done it?

Kate saying buh-bye to Tom right?

Blake Lively is a good choice

Mila Kunis? She is not quite a headliner yet, could use the bump. Then again her trajectory seems to be up and I would think someone on the downward swing would be more likely.

Emma Stone? Nope, seems perfectly content to be slowly rising star.

Ellen Page? Hmm, doesn’t seem the type.

Kate Upton? There we go.

Keira Knightley?
Jessica Biel?

As Bill Maher once said, “Dating a self-proclaimed 26-year-old virgin is probably not the best way to stifle the gay rumors. You’re a big star, you can have any woman you want, and you pick the one actress in town who doesn’t put out? I thought Scientology was supposed to clear your mind.”

That said, let her get back to her pre-marriage weight, and I’m ready to be her rebound man. She’s a little too skinny for me now.

Although, I’ve always found it odd that a self-proclaimed, proud virgin would do a nude scene, as she did in The Gift. There were only two good things about that movie, and her nipples were both of them.

So is he going to be going to Oprah’s and jumping off her sofa this time?

Hailee Steinfeld.

Someone must have found a way to slip a copy of “Rock of Ages” through the bars of Katie’s cell.

Thank God. Maybe Travolta will stop assaulting masseuses now that his main piece is back on the market.

In that case, you’re two days younger than me too (so, ya know… respect your elders.)

Count me among those that hope she gets un-brainwashed.

Guess they didn’t renew her contract.

Ouch. Anyway based on True Grit, she has talent.

I wonder if there was something in the prenup that required her to stay 5 years, or if certain benefits kicked in after 5 years. I also wonder how much she will see her daughter. I think in his last divorce the kids spent most of their time with him.

Whatever the guy’s faults, and there many of them, he’s made (and continues to make) some of the more entertaining films of our age, and is presently getting rave reviews for his most recent release where he plays, of all things, a rock star.

Knightly hardly needs a career boost. She has Oscar and BAFTA nominations and in 2008 was the highest paid British actress, second actress overall in Hollywood. So far all of her post-Pirates work has received a large amount of critical, if not commercial, success.

That would be a huge step down for her considering she’s marrying Justin Timberlake.

Sort of embarrassed that I know that. Sort of.

He could date Taylor Swift and then dump her and she could write a song about it.

Supposedly she’s asking for sole legal custody of Suri, meaning full control over things like religion and education. I don’t see Tom and the $cienos going along with that. It’ll be interesting.

I figured she’d be returned to the Paramount prop department.

Of course.

She could also be having her biological clock going off - remember when they were all dopey and “in love” and preggers with Suri and they couldn’t wait to have more kids? Strangely, after Suri was born (presumably the $cientology way) there weren’t any more babies…


I for one say about damn time. She stuck it out way longer than I would have imagined. I wish her all the best fighting off the nutjobs during the custody battle.

Free Katie!

Meanwhile, I wonder if Lindsey Lohan might be who he latches on to next. She’s young, she’s broken, and he can claim he “fixed” her.