Aw, don’t cry. I’m sure there’s some man, somewhere, who would appreciate your large breasts enough to let you be his spare wife. 
At least the guy is being upfront about what kind of man he is. Better to know he is an ass right off the bat then finding it out after investing time in him.
Canada must be warmer than I was thinking, at least in the summer. 
Personally, even while horribly overweight I thought of 3mph as too slow to qualify as a “clip”, and too slow to work up enough of a sweat to risk dehydration.
Yeah, jeez, you have to give him props for full disclosure: I AM A CONTROL FREAK AND WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU UNLESS YOU CAN ANSWER “YES” TO EVERY *** REPEAT*** EVERY ITEM ON MY CHECKLIST.
Keep reading, there’s a contract. Read it and sign it and voila, you’re this guy’s wife. No need for a wedding or anything, he doesn’t acknowledge earthly authority anyway.
Enjoy,
Steven
From his contract:
<<As your wife, I will:
Always love you with all my heart, mind, body and soul. >>
From the Bible:
One of the Pharisees tested Jesus with a question, “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” (Matthew 22:36 NIV). Jesus replied, " ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment."
So this guy has a God complex?!?
I’m in love!
He sounds like one of those guys who insists that the Constitution says he doesn’t have to pay taxes, and he and his wife and seven “co-wives” are going to be spending a lot of time in his compound in the desert.
I’m just waiting for some college guys to get together, create an artificial resume for a woman they know who will play the part and submit the application. With GPS, a few hidden cameras and such, it would be fun.
(bolding mine)
His #1 disqualification:
He mentions this a few times. One gets the feeling he’s been burned.
And he even goes beyond by asking for pictures that prove his potential wife isn’t a post-op transsexual. He’s at a livestock-ish level of invasion of privacy.
Sweet Zombie Jesus, I’d pay good money to see that. There must be some 'way hot struggling young actresses who’d be willing to play the bridal applicant.
I know all there is to know about the crying game
Ive had my share of the crying game
Darn it all, I’m a hair too old for him at 33. I fit his bra size 100% and I think I’m ok on his height/weight combo! I have light skin! Oh boy!
If he didn’t sound like such a potential stalker/freak, I’d go rattle his cage with a little “let’s pretend I’m down with this”
The sad thing? I’m sure there are women out there who are thinking “He sounds fantastic!”
This guy is an complete asshat no doubt but some of the female profiles aren’t a whole lot better.
You can’t smoke or drink or eat meat of any kind. Loud music is out as well as it gives me a headache. I like Anime and you need to as well. You need to be at least 5’10 because I’m 5’3" and I need to look up into your eyes. The love of poetry is a must! And you have to be able to make me laugh on a regular basis! Also you need to make a shit ton of money so that I can sit on my worthless ass and watch my favorite soaps!
Obviously I’m embellishing just a little bit but quite a few just have me shaking my head.
I’m a chap.
But reading this makes me want to have a sex change operation.
Oh wait. No it doesn’t.
So, wait. There’s weird people on the internet? With weird, bizarre, and antisocial desires?
Holy shit, I’ll get the pitchforks. We can all head down to the wholesale Torch’n’Rope emporium and get ready.
Obviously he’s a bit of a creeper - but at least he’s being forthright and given how many relationship threads I’ve seen that compose of a dozen reiterated "just be honest with what you want"s I can’t help but :dubious: a bit at the delight you’re all having ribbing on this guy.
Oh come on. There’s nothing wrong with knowing what you like, but just to see a knuckle-dragging misogynist out in the wild is worth posting about.
I’ve never done online dating so I don’t know crap about how often it is to see something like this, but for entertainment value only…this guy brings the lulz.
People aren’t mocking because of the honesty, people are mocking because of the crazy. There is a difference between wanting to be with someone who enjoys horse back riding and requiring that your potential SO ride a zebra to and from the store (you know, since he won’t let her work and all.)
It’s OK to be a giant creepy freak, as long as you’re honest about it?
No, it isn’t.
It isn’t? Why not?