“Somebody farted in your pants.”
What do you mean by “explain” it? I don’t think there’s any underlying semantic connection to the act of peeing, the most likely origin is from going to place a bet on a horse (supported by the “dog” variant). In my dialect, it can mean going to the bathroom, but it’s not limited to that. It’s a joking way of evasively or euphemistically saying that you’re leaving to do something slightly dubious. It can also just be a way of saying that you’re leaving.
I used “go water the porcelain” at my first real job: mail/supply clerk at one of the smallest agencies in federal government. Four guys took care of the entire agency’s mail & supply needs.
As a child I certainly didn’t think it meant going to pee.
I was hoping for a pony.
As a young adult I was sure he meant calling his bookie.
A Doper (@dropzone I believe) told me it meant taking a bathroom break.
When you said “I’m dense” it sounded as though someone had given you an explanation that made you feel you had missed some obvious connection between “going to see a man about a horse” and peeing. I don’t think there is one, it’s just idiomatic.
I did miss it.
Don’t wanna sound dumb.
But there you are.
Huh? The point is that I don’t see how you missed anything, at least in the sense that it’s not possible to deduce what the phrase means from its literal meaning.
I could explain my childhood and maybe you’d understand me better.
But who’s got that kinda time?
Plus I’m alittle air heady about things sometimes.
I’ve learned to live with it.
“Gotta go worship the God of Porcelain”
or sometimes “Time to pay my tithes.”
I don’t understand why you keep replying as though you think I’m saying that you are air-headed, when I’m saying the opposite. There is no obvious explanation for this phrase that you missed.
Anyway, it’s not a big deal.
If there’s one bathroom and someone is about to take a significant amount of time, it’s nice to let anyone who might get hung up needing to pee to play through first.
In our family, “I’m felling above average” is a warning that you’re gassy. It comes from an old newspaper magazine’s interesting facts page. The purported fact was that, on average, a person farted from 10 to 20 times per day.
I’m sorry.
Not you, necessarily, but I thought nearly everyone knew it meant going to the bathroom. But me.
I think @dropzone may have even told me it was common knowledge.
I think he called me an airhead a few times.
Not just you. Growing up in Iowa I guessed it meant doing something shady or dubious or embarrassing. Getting another beer, placing a bet, go play hide-the-salami with not your spouse.
I was older and much longer out in the world before I knew specifically. Fortunately I read a lot and reading between the lines in hundreds of mystery novels from the Boston Public Library I finally hit the nail on the head.
So, not just you, not at all.
Every so often, when we’re outside, in a very serious, ominous voice, I’ll state, “Don’t move” while looking at the ground behind her. A foot stomp releases all of the wind out of that invisible duck that was about to attack her. I’m her hero for saving her!
Getting another beer would definitely be within the scope of meaning in my dialect (U.K.), especially if already a bit tipsy. But it’s not used to imply really shady things like infidelity.
I’ve just decided my Daddy could’ve been doing just about anything going out “to see a man about a horse” since he was the one speaking the line.
He was bad.
He eventually did buy me a horse, there’s that.
Growing up in Minnesota, I learned it this way too. It mean the neighborhood men were heading to the bar for a brewski, or making a private deal, or planning to pull a prank on someone.
I used it in high school to leave early one day. My mother wrote an excuse that I had an appointment, but she didn’t specify what the appointment was. My homeroom teacher wanted to know and I answered that I was going to see a man about a horse. Well, my bestie burst out laughing, which made me laugh. That really startled the teacher so he kept asking. I gave the same answer and my bestie, while laughing, confirmed that this was the case. “Yes, she really is going to see a man about a horse.” And so it proved. I left school early and went on a long horseback ride with another friend who had already graduated.
That is probably the only way they will ever get there.
I use “I’m leaving to conclude my excretory functions”, but only if I’m in church.
Otherwise, I tell people I’m “fixing to run the shitter through its paces”.
I do an imitation of General MacArthur (or at least Gregory Peck’s portrayal of General MacArthur) and say:
“I shall return.”
(I am aware that this is only funny to a World War II buff.)