What have you always wanted to ask God?

I have pondered this question many times, but I always wondered what other people would ask. I always wondered what would happen if I asked God how old he is. Probably go something like this:

‘Hey God, how old are you?’
“I am eternal…”
‘(pointing finger)You don’t KNOW, DO YOU?’
“I KNOW EVERYTHING, I’M GOD, REMEMBER? Now off to Hell with you…”

Ok, so maybe it wouldn’t be a good thing to ask. But I think you get my point…

No c&p

I’d ask Him if Heaven is really as wonderful as they say it is.


I wonder what the king is doing tonight?

I’d like to ask Him why He didn’t consult me before He created the Universe.

Had He done so, I would have told Him to do it right or don’t bother.

But Noooo…

This space for rent.

I’d ask Him,"Why did ya send Satan(sdmb) down here,he belongs up there"awwww.

Well among others things , I would ask why my ass is built so close to the ground.

Ayesha - Lioness

There are two solutions to every problem : the wrong one, and mine
(Thomas A. Edison)

It took a god six days to build this ? For an all-powerful god you took your sweet time at it.

I think He sub-contracted the job out, and it shows.

Lousy workmanship.

This space for rent.

Tastes great or less filling?

The Duckbill Platypus = left over spare parts ?

Why did you put Adam and Eve in that garden when you knew what they’d do?

How do you decide which prayers to answer?

What does the Voynich cypher say?

Did Walter Payton really block that field goal against the Packers a couple weeks ago?

If I go on Who Wants to be a Millionaire, can I use you as a lifeline?

Give Neil Donald Walsch a call; he talks to God all the time. Anybody have some opinions on his “Conversations with God” books? He used to be a fuck-up and now is a NY Times best-selling author. God answered his prayers. Maybe God has already given him some of the answers you seek. Maybe God can tell all of us how to make such easy money…

“What if you were one of us?
Just a slob like one of us?
Just a stranger on the bus,
Trying to make your way home?”

“That book of yours. It was ghostwritten, wasn’t it. Come on, be honest!”


“What’s with all this premature death business? Way to make people believe in you, ya dickhead!”

Hero For A New Millennium!

The Legend Of PigeonMan - updates every Wed & Sat

Where’s my car keys?


I wouldn’t ask him anything. I try not to talk to myself too much.

If you wanted to go around giving land to people, why didn’t you make enough of it so that they wouldn’t have to slaughter each other for thousands of years over it.

Or maybe –

What kind of an egotistical and mal-adjusted omnipotence actually demands the worship and obedience of creatures as limited as humans. Don’t you have better things to do?

Or even –

How can you possibly justify an eternity of either suffering or ecstasy for the acts of a single human lifetime. That’s analagous to deciding a human being’s lifetime fate based upon the millisecond of thought he had at 1440:13:44 last Thursday.

but probably –

What kind of sick trick was it to make cats’ bellies so soft and their claws so pointy?

The best lack all conviction
The worst are full of passionate intensity.

So, Lord, what’s with the ticks?

Whats the point ?

And why didn’t you make computers smart enough to insert ’ where needed.

And question marks ? Shit ! Time for bed.
Now I lay me …