Me: 25 y.o GWF, hates going to parties but likes museums, theatre (when I can afford to go). Suffers wide knowledge gaps in traditional education, but can tell you anything you want to know about gymnastics, snakes, and the bubonic plague. Likes SF/fantasy as long as it’s not alien-related. Physical: red hair, stocky w/big chest. Prone to occasional fits of temper, fairly antisocial (mainly cause it’s hard to find people like me). You must be female, any race, not too trendy. Prefer femmy-looking girl cause I love to look at frilly clothes & jewelry but would never wear any myself.
Female. 28. Petite. Not fat, but not thin either. Vegetarian. Non-smoker. Long reddish-blonde hair. Four-eyed. Fit, but not athletic. Animal lover. Not an animal lover in that way you pervert! Has a dog and cat, living together, mass hysteria!
Has self esteem problems. Best picture of me is the one with the bag over my head.Insert wonderfully blurry pic here.
Likes doing a lot of Martha Stewart-y things, like “Make Your Own Flour”, “Genetically Engineer Your Own Glow in the Dark Chickens”, and “Build Your Own Home in 9289 Easy Steps”, things like that.
Crazy. Doesn’t take any drugs, but some people say she should.
Bored-with-life SWM seeks spectacular SWF to fulfill his completely unrealistic expectations. Applicants who think they are perfect enough to meet this simple criteria are too arrogant for consideration. Non-perfect specimens need not apply.
(Just kidding… sort of. I’m not sure exactly where the lines between sarcasm, self-deprecation, and reality falls on this.)
Male, 17. 6 ft…not fat, not thin, fairly muscular, and way too computer oriented for my own good. (Hence the fed investigation) Seeking intelligent, kind, interesting person that is better than I am.
Male, 41, 5’9", 185. Shy, quiet, underconfident, introverted computer geek with poor communication skills and diabetes. Allergic to cats, dogs, and dust, and not particularly fond of kids. Into the SCA, gaming, computer games, martial arts, and playing the recorder. SF Bay Area native transplanted to St. Paul, once he figured out what annual cold weather does to housing costs. Non-smoker, drinks beer like a fish (if fish drank beer, that is…). Ex-tuba player. Seeks female companion who doesn’t think that any of the above makes me a bad person.
You are NOT going to believe me when I tell you that I said this out loud at work last week! I laughed until I cried and everyone else just looked at me. I think I’m hilarious! 
The only one here who would work for me is Stccrd. (The rest of ya’ll are too old!) Hey there, Stccrd!
SWF, 5’6", 33, auburn hair to mid-back, blue four-eyed chemical engineer with good head for numbers, low taste for puns, slight tendency to frightening brightness of mind (for common populations, certainly not to the denizens of the SDMB). Loves to bake, tai chi, expose unsuspecting innocent strangers to scathing but usually harmlessly-overlooked irony, dancing in any style involving eye and skin contact usually contra, being spoiled rotten by appreciative man, whisky, grilled steak, gardening, and reading. I like to snuggle inside when it rains, and have deep conversations about a wide range of topics.
A little too introspective with occasional flashes of the blues, unwilling to tolerate a fool unless strong possible for tormenting same exists, holds a grudge a looong time, demands to be paid equal for equal work but still demands to be treated like a lady, high integrity but demands same in return. Hot tempered, but only in short bursts and quite susceptible to reason afterward unless insulted (see ‘holds a grudge’ above). Astonishing weakness regarding foot and back massage (giving and getting).
Looking for a caring fellow who wants to have good company, but whom won’t want to up and get married, ever (or move in, ick). Possessive, insecure, abusive or shallow men need not apply.
Or I could just say I’m LindyHopper’s dream date. Except I don’t ski. Brrrrr.
SWJM, 25, engineer/computer geek, 5’11" & skinny. Spends way too much time at the computer but can hold conversation on anything from history to Richard Strauss to cooking. Seeking SWM, age less important than maturity and patience, because I’m not the “sweep you off your feet” type. Instrument rating and access to aircraft a plus, as are musical ability or just knowledge.
Out of curiousity, any of you actually try these? Some are just crazy enough to work. If I read “I like long walks on the beach and cuddling on the couch” one more time I’m going to barf.
28yo Latin, overweight, female with a tendency towards being neurotic. I am looking for someone that, like me, enjoys chilling and relaxing by staying at home or close to home. I enjoy movies, outdoor walks and easygoing activities. I don’t really enjoy bars, clubs or large unruly crowds but I am willing to attend such places should my significant other enjoy those activities. I’m not much of a drinker and I will rarely get drunk or lose control in public but, I’m not an un-fun person to be around when drunk. I am usually nervous when meeting people for the first time but I’m actually pretty cool so if I can get past the initial jitters, I’ll do just fine. I clean up well and can be taken into all sorts of social situations. I’m smart, pretty, housebroken, won’t tear furniture and I don’t usually bite (love nibbles are not considered bites IMO). I’m extremely loyal, loving, caring and nurturing, but I’ve had my heart broken before so I’m also nervous, and initially distrustful.
This quiet, unobtrusive, average looking, working class female with great communication skills, a great sense of humor, and a genuine desire to make people happy seeks someone to share her life with.
I’ll believe it. That phrase, properly intoned, can make me hysterical and helpless with laughter. “What’s it say… Oh no… I can’t REEEEEEEEEAAAD!”
SWM, 29, 6’5", 240 lb, slightly thinning brown hair and sharp blue eyes. Has a tendency to either be the aw-gawrsh shy type or the ridiculously talkative center of attention. Intelligent without being pseudointellectual. Has a tendency to walk into things due to mind’s inclination to constantly wander (as well as having face constantly stuck in a book). Plays D&D and has a love for pulpy fantasy, science fiction and cyberpunk. Enjoys computer games but is really really bad at Counterstrike. Works out regularly and is in good shape, enjoys mountain biking (but has a tendency to fall off bike), volleyball and golfing. Practices martial arts and yoga on and off. Loves spicy food and is a fairly good cook. Lazy housekeeper but hates a messy apartment. Works to live, doesn’t live to work. Secretly still loves 80’s hair bands and old-school rap. Fairly conservative and not a risk-taker. Starting to get tired of dating.
Searching for SF, race unimportant, 25-35, enjoys working out (without being a fanatic or gym rat), likes going out and trying new things as well as hanging out at home with Blockbuster and a movie. Must enjoy slightly doofy, absent-minded-but-well-meaning types. Has sweet, outgoing personality and talk as much as (or more than) I do. Intelligence mandatory. Must enjoy pop-culture references, computers, and at least willing to tolerate my D&D habit. Also must be a Bears fan and know what a screen pass, option play and offensive interference are.
34 SWM- shaved head, goatee, earring in left ear. Non-smoker, no drugs, rarely drinks but not averse. Addicted instead to computers, but loves doing outdoor sports such as kayaking, hiking, camping, mountain biking, and does so as much as possible. Struggling vainly to lose 20 pounds, but unlikely to ever succeed.
Artist, but scientist in former life- reads biology texts for fun (as well as sci-fi, fantasy, horror- all voraciously). Dog person, but can tolerate cats. Loves sushi, all forms of seafood, and peanut butter cup Blizzards from Dairy Queen (hence the 20 pounds). Currently suffering from serious wanderlust.
You know, Ziactrice, I was reading your post, going “Hummina hummina hummina…”, and then I read this:
:eek:, but also very 
(even if you don’t ski. :))
So, how you doin’? 
28, kinda’ single bi female, 5’10" and…136 pounds (yes folks 10 pounds off what the drivers’ license will tell ya) chemically blonde litigator with wonderful type “A” personality seeks either:
older intelligent male professional around 50ish who will make me his arm candy, but who must tolerate the fact that when I hit 35 I will stop liking older males and will be seeking a young hardbody…must like kitties and large dogs, must not be adverse to taking viagra.
or
young, sexy, HWP female who is hot, hot, HOT. Yes, I’d like you to be reasonably intelligent, but I can make exceptions if you’re HOT. You would be needed for a physcial relationship only. Please be INTO women and not just pretending to be into women.
Oh and ** Slainte [b/] you are a bit MORE than "reasonably attractive
Oh my… Thank you. You’re muy picante yourself.
You, Me & Zanshin all in the same thread again - gettin’ warm in here.
Everyone’s either too young or lives too far away – except maybe Astro. Whaddya think? Although not lacking baggage, I’m pretty functional – but we may be able to work out some symbiotic thing on my (usually deeply buried) rescue fantasies. (BTW, my lasagne is quite tasty, although nothing to swim raging rivers for.)
I thought that would get your attention. <goodness, what we really needed was a smooch smilie> You can hummina me anytime, how’s that?
Geez, it sounds like there are enough of us to start our own affinity group/ dating club / secret code phrase group.
Maybe it’s a new pickup line:
HIM - “Hi, I’m whistlepig and I can’t REEEEEEEAAAD!”
HER - “I so want you!”
I gotta go mow my lawn, chase the dog and say to her, “I can’t REEEEEEAAAD!” while giggling. Thankfully, are my neighbors are accepting hippies except for the Ned Flanders Family.
BTW, would y’all email my ex-girlfriend and tell her, “Dammit, it’s FUNNY!”
::tosses his hair flirtaciously::
::ponders flexing::
::figures she knows where that picture is::
Oh. Me? 5’10" 160 lb bisexual agnostic atheist seeks someone interesting and attractive between 18 and … 28? I don’t really care. I’ve had the hots for women almost in their 50s before.
Enjoys computers, computer-related things and languages. Accents a definite plus. The right smile will captivate me forever.
Turn-ons: using Preview.
Turn-offs:smilies that get in the way of an otherwise decent post.