Lately I’ve been sulking about how dull my life’s become. Shower, go to work, come home, eat, sleep, repeat until dead.
Why have I never been in a high speed car chase? Why have I never had to rescue a beautiful girl from the dastardly clutches of a warped mad scientist? Why have I never battled to the death with a claw handed foe in a hallucinatory hall of mirrors? I’ll tell you why, because my names too dull, that’s why!
Sure, Adam’s a totally functional name and all, but check out “The Sidehackers” hero Ross Hagan’s filmography on the Internet Movie Database ( http://us.imdb.com/Name?Hagen,+Ross ). Check out those character names. Buck Cassidy, Captain Fritz Drago, Frank Maddux, Sid Ryker, Red Dunleavy. Some of his characters were so cool that they only needed miscellaneous verbs and adjectives for a name: Crank, Speed, Midnight, Saber, snake, etc. Now, those are the names of adventurers!
Take my accountant for example, would Bradley Snodgrass have become an accountant had he been born Buck Steele? Perhaps, but you could bet Buck Steele CPA would be a two-fisted, take no prisoners, plays by his own rules, loose cannon of the accounting world! Or how about my high school algebra teacher Norman Blevins, you think anybody’d shoot a spitball at him if he’d been born Andre Blood or Charlie Scar? Hell no!
So, I’m asking the good folks of the MPSIMS to help me come up with my new adventurer name. At the moment I’m leaning towards sharp, knifey names (John Scythe, Mike Saber, Buck Masters, Seth Dagger) or hard material names ( Jack Steel, Flint Irons, David Granite, Stone Phillips) spellings can be creative (Steele, Sabre, Bloode, Scull).
Oh, side note. Ross Hagans real name: Leland Lando Lilly. Ugh…