[choke - cough - chortle]
I guess this explains why boys aren’t interested in me 
gi “Mmm…beer nuts” gi, (more than just one of the boys)
Well I’m a 19-year-old female, and I’ve never been on a date or had a boyfriend or kissed or anything. I see no problem with being single, but if you’re looking, you might as well join some clubs. You do meet a lot of people in them, and I know several couples who met through different clubs at my college.
Be chivalrous. Girls love that. At least I do, anyway.
I used to be there, so taking advice from me might be the blind leading the blind. OTOH, I have a wonderful girlfriend now: miracles occur :D.
Somewhere I read some advice that I thought was very wise (I think it was culled from the Tao of Steve, which I’ve not seen):
- Be cool.
- Be excellent.
- Be absent.
Be cool. Although I spent a lot of time in my youth pursuing relationships, it never worked. I was clearly looking for a relationship, and just as clearly didn’t think I was worthy of one. Women I was interested in saw that I didn’t think I was a real hottie, and they trusted me. If you’re like me, you’ll not get in a relationship as long as you’re looking for one. Give it up. Only then will you have a chance.
Be excellent. Do something interesting. If you want to spend time with a particular woman, don’t offer dinner-and-a-movie. Offer to take her to the castle that a crazy person built in your hometown and that hardly anyone knows about. Suggest that y’all go to the beach with your supercool kites and fly them. See if she’ll go contra dancing with you. Suggest something fun to do together, show her that you’re an interesting person who has interesting experiences.
Be absent. She can’t miss you unless you’re gone. Don’t hang around her like a whipped hound dog, cringing at her while you gaze at her adoringly. If you go back to her house (or dorm, or apartment) after a night out, don’t hang around until she has to kick you out, in hopes that something’s gonna happen. End dates while they’re still fun, before they have a chance to drag, and give her a bit of space so that she’ll be looking forward to seeing you again, not be expecting your call at 10 am sharp the next morning.
I might, if I’m feeling cynical, add a fourth rule:
- Be tipsy. If you’re uptight and inhibited, nothing like a little bit of alcohol to help you relax – if you’re that kind of drunk. For that matter, it doesn’t hurt if you’re both one sheet to the wind. Obviously, you don’t want to get puking drunk, and you don’t want to do anything dangerous – but I’ve known plenty of great relationships that started in an alcoholic mist, as people let down their hair and felt more comfortable flirting.
Daniel
Disclaimer: The honest truth spoken in this reply will seriously piss off most women and femininsts!
Getting a serious relationship just happens. You can’t force it. You can’t make it happen. Whe you get along with someone and they feel the same it’s kismet.
Getting laid, on the other hand, is quite easy and can be formulated. I’m going to tell you the cosmic secret of how to get laid.
First off, you need to know that women want one thing. Your undying attention. If you give it to them, they have what they want from you, and they lose interest. You have to show interest without seeming desperate. Your OP comes off a little desperate.
Second, you have to be supremely confident. This does not mean cocky. Women are turned off of cocky unless you have publicly backed up your reason for being cocky (football star, beat someone up, etc…).
When ever you are in a social situation and a woman talks to you, look her straight in the eye when either of you speak. After 10 seconds excuse yourself with some bogus task (gotta get a drink; there’s an old friend of mine, can you hang on just a second?, etc…) and just walk away. Just make sure you are still visible.
This last thing drives women crazy (remember the first point?). They will beat each other up just to talk to you again.
You have just created a game that promotes competition. Keep playing this game and eventually the competition will escalate to the point where they will offer their bodies to be with you.
Just remember, these women have no self-esteem (though they may be very pretty) and will be very petty. Not the kind of woman you want to have a long term relationship with. Avoid it no matter how good the sex is.
You don’t have to be good looking. You don’t have to be rich. But, you do have to play a very subtle ass-hole in public. Don’t be a raging jerk as this will have the opposite effect.
Also, be forewarned the first few times you try this it will be awkward and unnatural. Don’t give up. You just have to find your style and rhythm.
This worked for me flawlessly for years. Now I have a wonderful wife and it’s time to pass the mantle.
Christ, do we have to have this farking discussion EVERY Thursday?
I didn’t mean that to be as harsh as it sounded…
I have a hint, come back to the board more often & read the advice posted… 
I’m still trying to figure out what you mean by ’ getting serious’
BF…
May I buy a clue?
Maybe if you’d leave your email or instant messenger open on your profile, girls could get to know you better! 
It helps if you can spel
This is true. I got compliments on my looks (me, of all people, :D) when I completely concentrated on fixing computer problems.
I met my SO by exocising the bugs in a Fortran program she wrote. Funny story that I might tell one day.
hedra is really right about this. Being good at things–not bragging about how good you are at them–is very attractive. I love watching my SO cook or garden, because he’s so in his element. You wouldn’t think gardening could be sexy, but you’d be surprised…
Also, this might be a totally sleazy thing to say, but do volunteer work with kids. Seriously. That can make you melt-worthy.
I’ve posted this in other, similar threads, but it’s everything I’ve learned in my entire life (and I’m old enough to be your father) about women.
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Some girls try on men like they try on clothes. You’ll have your heart broken. deal with it.
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Girls love self-confidence. That’s why they’re attracted to jerks. Most young men have not learned that it is possible to be self-confident without being a jerk.
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The best way to gain self-confidence is to be good at something. Anything. So find something, get good at it, and be a leader at it.
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The young women who are most attracted by this strategy are likely to be the most interested in the thing that you’re good at. This means you start with common interests. Yes, that leaves a bunch of young women out of your dating pool. This is not a bad thing.
Getting back to that desperation thing, if anyone gave an explaination, I missed it. The best way to appear desperate, and completely repell girls is to enage them in a conversation that (roughly) starts like this:
" I’ve been hoping to meet a nice girl…" If you utter this sentence, you may as well not continue, because they’re already stopped listening if they haven’t actually ran away.
For example, a guy I worked with last summer (who was 24 as were my friends and I) said this to just about every unmarried woman working there. The three of us who were sort of friendly with him immediately compared notes and concluded that he was desperate. Apparently we weren’t the only ones to think so, because even the women who had seemed slightly interested in him backed off after we heard him have that conversation with them.
IMO, if a girl asks you about your dating status, fine, tell her you’re single. Don’t volunteer the information unasked to every girl you ever talk to, though, or you may as well pin a scarlet “D” to your chest for all the interest from them you’d gain.
It helps to recognize how rare it is for two people to connect truly, and adjust your expectations accordingly. If you expect that you may well go a few more decades without meeting that special someone (and you might), then you’ll be able to focus on enjoying yourself here and now, which actually (as has been noted) makes you more attractive.
No date? Do something you want to do, and get good at it. Keep getting shot down by attractive women? Happens to us all, but you can, as cheerfully as possible, use the time and money and energy you might have spent on dating on yourself, maybe joining a winetasting club or taking a trip someplace you’ve always wanted to see or buying a nice comfortable couch to replace that decades-old Salvation Army thing with deteriorating pillows. The point is, don’t put pressure on yourself to find that love-of-your-life today. When or if you do, you’ll be a lucky fellow, but if since it’s beyond your control ultimately, you need to find things to do that please you, and that are in your control. The best part is that finding such things makes it easier, not harder, to be interesting to that l-of-your-l when you do find her.
This is the blind leading the blind, FWIW.
You don’t have dates because you don’t have references. Women are just like men. No matter how much they hate to admit it, it’s important to them to be with someone that other women find desirable. At our age, dating is not about finding the right one and falling in love. It is about social status.
Since you don’t sound like an alpha male, your best bet is probably to move into a target rich environment. Do you have any female friends? Spend lots of time with them , meet people through them. If not, try taking a class in something traditionally (remember I said traditionally before you bite my head off) feminine, such as cooking or crafts. Good luck and don’t give up.
Yeah, I’m sure you know more about when girls like to be approached than an attractive girl who gets approached a lot… :rolleyes:
Don’t the doper women want to see a photo of the OP so they can decide what is/isn’t attractive?
I have to agree with this.
A few more points to make here:
!. get over you fear of rejection. best way to do this is go into it head first. and know that your not going to do good at first; thats ok nobody ever does.
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when you do strike up conversations; take control of them! you ask the questions and you take it where you want it to go. (and btw you can just go up and start talking)
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Don’t believe this crap women tell you they are looking for a nice guy… thats bs… these are the same women who say that but do the exact opposite. Now i’m not saying you should be a total a-hole to women but you should definately have an attitude of “I play life by my own rules” kinda thing. Also don’t aqree with everything a woman says if you disagree let her know.
I’ll just elaborate on what’s already been posted: self-confidence is the most important thing. Honestly. When I was a wee lad I looked like a hobbit (fat, unruly hair, self-deprecitive). I ended up enlisting in the Marines and came out and had girls talking to me all the time. Take care of your body. Have a nice smile. Walk with your shoulders squared, your back straight, like you can take on the world. Women love that. After all, you <i>can</i> take on the world. You’re eighteen; you have your whole life in front of you, and it’s yours to do with as you please.