The Law Of Averages? Bullshit.
You look around, there’s gotta be at LEAST 100 teenage girls I know and find to be “cool”. Out of those 100, I like maybe 30. 30% you’d think is a fair enough number that at least one might like me, but NO! It’s always these dumb girls. Girls that smoke, girls that drink, girls that might just not even be girls! When I look for a girl I don’t just look at her but how she acts, how intelligent she is, and of course her physique. When I was young, I used to like the nice pretty girls in the playboys that my brother stashed in the cabinet in his room. Now I like the fun girls, the ones I can talk to.
Today I went to an amazing dance, for teens only. It was great. There was a girl I met, maybe one week ago that I find to be the most amazing and fun girl I’ve met in a LONG time. We both “share” the same best friend. Through her I’ve asked all about this girl, and she even went as far as to ask if she liked me back. She just replied: “I don’t know him well enough”. So I ask her to the floor, for the first time in a long time I could acctually dance! I don’t know if she felt the same way though, I think shes an amazing dancer and she thinks otherwise. After a song or two I get tired and wander off to the bar for some coke and she walks off to sit down. I let her have some, not expecting anything in return but a closer friendship or something to come out of it. Oh well, I really wish she’d appreciate that it took all the strength and courage I had in my little heart to ask her to dance. Oh well, maybe somewhere down the line, I’ll find someone who I like and likes me a fraction of it back. Until then, I guess theres always internet porn and my left hand.
Cheers and Goodnight!
d12
Just wait until you get one that likes you, and you don’t like her! Oh man, I could tell you some stories…
Dating is a game of numbers dude. You seem to have caught on to part of it with the 30% figure, but you didn’t take it quite far enough.
Out of those thirty girls, you only asked one. One!!!
If you ask out ten girls, you will be lucky if one says yes, so might I suggest at the next dance, you ask a few others out onto the floor. Even a few that you aren’t really interested in.
You get the experience of asking someone to dance, thus improving your communication skills with the ladies, and the other girls get to see this really fun guy out on the dance floor. It’s a win/win situation bro.
Until you’re willing to really put yourself out there and talk to a girl you like, all you’re gonna have is your wishing and your ‘maybes’.
I apologize if this sounds cruel, but I feel I must be blunt. It wasn’t too long ago that I spent all my time moping around cursing my ‘luck’ with girls, too, and I wish there had been someone to take me by the shoulders and shake that crappy attitude right out of me back then. You make your own luck, and if the best effort you’re able to put forward is to ask a girl to dance and hope she someone figures out on her own that you want a closer relationship with her, you’ll probably be SOL.
Uh… did you buy her a coke, too? Did you even ask if she wanted something from the bar? Did you walk her back to where she was sitting? Did you thank her for the dance?
All these little things are called manners and trust me, they can impress the hell out of us ladies, no matter what age we are!
Good call Squish- I just assumed he had done those things. Pay attention to the lady d12.
I have had great success with opening doors, offering coats, offering lights (if you smoke…and always remember to light hers first), getting drinks, (in fact, you should have gotten her a drink whether she asked or not) etc. Do not curse in front of them, do not talk badly about other girls, ESPECIALLY your ex-girlfriends, even if they ask.
It’s true…Some girls might want the “badboy” type of a guy, but far more want the “Awwww…He’s so sweet” guy.
A couple of other things that should go without mentioning are good grooming, personal hygeine, etc. I was at a concert a few weeks ago, and a guy was complaining to me about how he had been blown off by 20 girls that night. Seeing as how his breath (from a few feet away even) smelled like garlic, I couldn’t imagine why they weren’t all over him.
I asked if she wanted anything, and I bought her a coke. Didn’t say thanks, we kinda went seperate wayish after the song ended.
Good grooming and Personal hygeine are the two things I’ve been paying alot of attention (not that I never did (now I go through everything with a microscope)).
It’s really weird, on MSN Messanger we have the most scintillating conversations but Seems as though we hardly talk in real life, then again, nobody talks too much at a nightclub/dance. To tell you the truth, last night was like a book. It opened nice, I danced with some friends, but when I asked ThePerfectGirl™ to dance, it took every ounce of courage in me and when we went to the floor it was such a climax, when we went off about 5-10 minutes later it was the world’s worst anti-climax.
I don’t like the idea of waiting too much. From personnal experience, waiting makes you become friends but never anything more than good friends. I know everyone will say if you don’t want to be friends than whats the point? Well I would just die if I could meet her beautiful lips with mine, run my fingers through her hair, and call her to tell her how my day went.
Punk Rock Never Sounded So Sad.
d12
(who is listening to I Feel So… by Box Car Racer right now)
Did you wait until the very end of the dance to ask her?
My guess is she is shy…Hence, she talks on IM, but won’t IRL. She needs some confident young man* to bring her out of the shell. (Shyness may also be the reason she didn’t thank you for the Coke)
[sub]*You. Or if you don’t make your move, some other guy[/sub]
Naw, my friends kept telling me to ask her to dance. I had to sneak a few shots in first. I asked her to dance like halfway through, but the song ended then we had a bit of a slowdance then we both went our seperate ways.
“A few shots”? As in alcohol? If that’s the case…DUDE! You fool! She was probably one of those weird girls that bought into the “underage drinking” campaign, and thinks you are a loser! No girl wants a drunk guy hitting on her.
Trust me on this…I’ve tied a few on before, thinking I would be more confident. Yeah, it makes you confident alright…Right up until she blows you off.
Talk to her on IM, see how she reacts after last night. If she responds favorably, maybe see if she would like to get together sometime.
I wasn’t drunk, just had a bit of a buzz. Someone told me that it might help take some of that reluctance to do stuff away. I don’t really know why I listened. I rarely drink, and in small ammount when I do.
Dude…(I’m trying to be “cool” here) You should never listen to your friends. How much experience have they had with women? 99% less than they claim, I bet. You need to listen to us older and wiser dopers.
I did, but then I had to fly to work. Spit, I just realized that. I dunno, I figure I’ll write her an email as I’m just too chicken to even tell her thanks and I like her etc… on msn or even in person.
Dopers are by far the best to talk to!
