Maybe it’s just me but I don’t really like a cocky attitude. Confidence, good. Cockiness, not so good.
I like the modest type as long as he’s not too introverted. Then again I’m only speaking for myself and I have odd relationship habits for a teenage girl.
That’s because you’ve never met me. 
[sub]That’s how you work cockiness d12![/sub]
Here’s a challenge:
Go somewhere you don’t usually go, and talk to girls/ask them to dance/do whatever is going on, and see how many rejections you can pile up. By this I don’t mean be rude, but just keep at it, with Perfect Girls, girls out of your league, girls older than you, etc.
If you can accumulate 100 or so rejections in one night, you ought to be able to handle a few from girls who genuinely interest you, and move on without looking back. You may even find that the “rejecters” are suddenly interested in you because you move on so effortlessly.
Sorry for you. Hope it will turn out better next time…
And, like other posters wrote : cocky is bad. Self-confident is good, very good, extremely good, in whatever situation…
I’m nowhere near cocky. I’m far too modest. They don’t seem to appreciate my philosophy that EVERYTHING is EVERYONES fault.
d12 wrote in the very first post:
“So I ask her to the floor, for the first time in a long time I could acctually dance! I don’t know if she felt the same way though, I think shes an amazing dancer and she thinks otherwise. After a song or two I get tired and wander off to the bar for some coke and she walks off to sit down. I let her have some, not expecting anything in return but a closer friendship or something to come out of it.”
I thought at once: “This is a Henry in his teens. No manners at all.”
OK. So I read everything in this thread.
I learned my manners in the street. So, as You can guess, I did not have so much of that stuff. But You do not have to figure out everything about Yourself, just do this:
- Go to a library. read a book about manners. Three times. After that You are almost perfect.
- Go often to a library. There the real girls are lurking. And play cool. Never, never begin a conversation in a library. If the girl begins, just tell her that it might be better to speak “outside”.
Usually they do not begin, but check beforehand if ther is a nice Cafe’ nearby the library. - Register every girl in the library. Remember them.
Check what they were reading. If You get cought for going to the same shelf where the girl put the book back, and that You checked the book, use it.
“OK. I got caught! I just could not resist to look what You were reading…” NO girl will let You out of sight before she knows everything about Your thoughts (about her). Absolutely nobody!!!
Your own thoughts does not mean anything to her at this stage.
OK, never speak about Yourself if not asked. Speak only about her interests. (We are all egoistic fools in that age, and most of us through the whole life).
So have the upper hand = You just keep asking, = showing interest, about her.
OK. So You have not met anyone yet. But You have registered about 20 girls in the library. Now You go were You usually go at Saturdays. Probably there will be some of these registered ones. If not, register more. Remember always what they wear or in what section of the library they were and tings like that.
If the registered girl number 36 wears a nice scarf, remember that!
OK. So the next Saturday You see the girl that had the nice scarf.
Don’t do anything. Just speak with the guys…
Check the entries. Sooner or later she will go to the ladies room, or to the bar to order something etc. etc.
Be situated so, that You can see her face = eyes when she goes there. Wait. Be patient.
Ok. Here she comes. Stare at her. Yes, stare, it is the best way to get eye-contact. And keep the eye-contact for Christs sake! Do not let her know that You are shy. Do not play that card now!
Keep the eye-contact, keep it. If she looks away, You should not. Do not be polite here, this is a hard game.
When she goes back, give her maximum a glimpse.
A little bit back:
She is coming forward.
If You are just now speaking with the guys, Your friends, and she looks in Your direction, stop even in a middle of a sentence.
So what do You do now? Nothing!!! Play it cool.
What does she do? Thinking, thinking, thinking… “What was with that guy?? Why was he looking at me???
And then when I came out, he did not even notice me??? Just a glimpse”
It bugs her. It does not mean a thing, if she liked You or not. It bugs her.
Later. You can dance with whomever, but ask her to dance.
She will probably not say no, because she wants to know!!!
Now, You are on Your own.
Just a few hints:
- do not tell her You have seen her in the library, while dancing.
Ask her to the bar while dancing. If she says no (reasons varies), escort her back to were You took her.
Now she is at the place where You took her. She is at her home base, feeling safe.
When she is sitting down, ask if You can bring her something.
Remeber, she is safe and she wants to knowww!!!
She will most probably say Yes! to that… If no, just sail away as You were the coolest guy in town. Because now You are a cool guy!
- She will sooner or later ask why You look at her in that manner You did? Tell her that You have seen her somewhere and that You know where… (Now she will burst).
Try to keep it cool. So, then You tell: “You have this kind of scarf, colour this and that…” She says: “Yes!”
Now she knows, that it is not just the usual “I’ve seen You somewhere!”-stuff.
Well in the end You have to tell her that You saw her in the library. Add, if possible/needed, that it was not only the scarf…
When the women are a little bit older, and if they are very good looking and have brains, they have one problem:
Only the good-looking guys, with much selfconfidence (= big ego, mostly) have the guts to begin a conversate with them.
And these women are sick and tired of these guys.
So, if You look just average, check always the best looking woman in the house, restaurant, bar what-ever. And go to her and ask for a dance or what is proper in that place.
She will say “Yes”.
My assossiates always wonder how I get so good-looking women? Well, that’s why.
Back to the library:
Read only good books, classics and poems. If You are a writer-type, write poems and read poems, much of that stuff. If You are not, read poems.
You have to be ready when “Miss-Right” is coming Your way.
I was living my childhood and teens in Helsinki, the Finnish capital.
I used to get a rate Yes/No, 1:1 on methodical things as described here above.
Just out of the blue-things was scored 3 No!'s and 1 Yes!
If I took a few “shots” the fucking scores went down the drain.
So, once I was in the library, in a position where I had to take a book from the shelf. (It was a girl approching…) I thought that I take any book and just read it.
The book was something like “The History of Statues and Monuments in Helsinki”.
“O, fu*k, what a bore”, but as a stubborn guy, I begun to read.
It was the most “giving” book I have read!
It was summertime and I just kept lolling in the center of the capital of Finland.
So I registered a chick coming up, let’s say 3 o’clock (that means the direction of the right). You can see from the pacing, if the girl is in hurry or has an aim to go somewhere. Never begin to speak with the girls that have no time for You in the first place.
If not, she is just strolling around. Try to say something, if it is proper.
OK. So I usually loked at the statue. If the chick even glimpsed at the statue “I knew my course” as S-speare put it. I begun, just out of the blue to tell the chick about the history of the statue…
Every question she ever had, gave an answer like:
“No, not this one, but further there in the park there actually is a statue…” and so on.
The rate was higher than 1:1!
Back to the bar.
If Your friends drinks Pepsi or what ever shit, order for coffee. (You are the cool guy, remember!)
She will notice, if not directly, but later Your even empty cup of coffee. If the others are drinking alcohol, and it is that kind of bar, the stupid chick thinks You have a car. (That she gets a free ride home).
The more observant women, wants to know why You are drinking coffee. Not so that she ever asks, she just register it. She will re-remember it, when You put out Your famous EyE-contact. (Only famous to You!, You calculating schwine!)
The rate is low, if the women are drunk. They can’t just concentrate on a guy more than one minute… or 2 seconds.
So You have to make a move. If You want, of course.
If they are sober, the rate is acceptable high, but You still have to make a move.
If You stay sober, the rate is high. If You drink, it can be whatever, depending on how much You drink.
Have patiance. And train Yourself to meet girls that says: No!
They are the best trainers You ever will have, not we that try to get a piece of advise. Remember that!
I was very shy in my teens.
Now I am older and have lived with some dozen of women, which of three has been wives… And I am still kicking. Now I am living with a divorced Russian woman and her 16 year old daughter.
And life rolls well.
So, if You need anything in this way, just call Papa Henry, and I guarantee that following my advise, the problems in You life of to day are just a laughter tomorrow.
Tomorrow comes the real problems; You will be used, Your heart will be a rug on the floor at the door where the women are cleaning their shoes when they step into Your soul. They will burn everything down and in the end You will only taste ashes in Your mouth.
A gentleman does never do that to a woman. Try to be one.
Btw. There is about 4 - 5 “the-only-right-girl-in-my-life”.
That is the real problem.
Try to survive through Your life, You can’t get through it alive, just try to be nice.
Thank You for reading.
Have a nice day.