You have a crush on me.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

And I’m cool with it, baby.

Who’s the man that can bring you the tittilation that you so badly need? Mr. C.

Where do you turn when you need someone to drive you wild with innuendo? Right here, sugarlips.

When you’re in the shower, with the massaging showerhead in your grip, who’s the man that comes to mind? In the flesh, baby.

Don’t worry. I won’t tell. It’s our secret, yours and mine.

Every time you eat a bananna, whose name catches in your throat? When you see a peach dripping juices, what do you think of?

When you watch hardcore pornography, whose name do you scream while you furiously masturbate?

That’s right.

But it’s our secret.

I promise.

2

Wow. Thanks for clueing me in. And all this time I thought it was Benjamin Bratt. I can see how I was easily confused though.

3

you promised fatherjohn you wouldn’t tell anyone, and now look what you’ve done. I wouldn’t blame him if he never forgives you for revealing his secret to the TM.

4

if he asks for the SUV he gave you back. :slight_smile:

5

Mr. Cynical , thank you so much for finally telling me what was bothering me.

For weeks now, I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. But now I know the deepest desires I have. And it’s all because of my crush on you.

Now I know where my Tequila and beer went to. It was all gone because I couldn’t bear to be sober without you.

But it’s our secret.

I promise.
Tripler

6

Don’t worry baby. I’ll never tell.

You can ply me with your liquor, you can tempt me with fine chocolates.

But when you think about me, and you feel that familiar tingling in your loins, just remember who you belong to.

You are mine.

Keep doing those stretching exercises. And the kegels.

7

It’s your bellybutton “that can hold a roll of quarters” and your “willy-nilly” butt hair that really turns me on!

8

You’ve caught me. White handed.

9

You were so, SO close… but I just cant be attracted to a man who cant spell banana. Otherwise you were a shoo-in!

Mnementh runs off, sobbing

10

Ooohhhh yeah baby…

Tripler?
Right thread…wrong person :slight_smile:

11

You forgive me my banana spelling, and I’ll forgive you your lack of apostrophe in can’t.

Who loves you baby? Yeah, it’s all good, spelling, punctuation or no. Just leave out the period, baby, and I’ll throw you the exclamation mark.

12

Oh Mr. Cynical, how did you know?
How did you know it was you that I think of every minute of every day? How did you know I fall asleep to thoughts of you every night? How did you know it was your name on my lips when I woke up from a wonderful, sensual dream?
I thought for sure you didn’t know, I thought for sure I hid it well.
Let’s just keep this between ourselves, ok? Please don’t post it on the message boards, we wouldn’t want people to talk.

Forever yours,
Rose

:wink:

13

So, when I have those nice dreams and have an orgasm in my sleep, I was dreaming about you? Thanks for clearing up the mystery. It’s a great weight off my mind.

14

Mr Cyn…

And whose golden tresses do you think of when a splot of bird poop slithers down your windshield? brachy’s

And whose smoldering eyes do you dream of when you hear the phrase “Babs gak and that guy from Marcus Welby”? brachy’s
Now I’m off to take that shower!

15

Excuse me, did you say I have a crush on Mr. C?

Well, I admire the man. He was always a good father to Joanie and Richie, and he gave good advice to the Fonz. But no, I just don’t get that “frisky” feeling for him…

16

Just leave out the period, baby, and I’ll throw you the exclamation mark.

hmmmmm now I know there was a worst pick-up lines thread around here somewhere
:wink:

17

I do?

Robin

18

Oh MrC, the heart of my desire! I think of you every nite. While streching the sheets my heart rapidly beats. Then I throw away the cover and go DAMN! Where’s MrC! my lover!? I’m past the point of being nice so I give you ONE more invatation to paridise! :angry:

Oh MrC!! :spinning flaily:

I need you!

I NEED YOU NOW!!!

:smiley:

19

I always thought it was nausea.

20

Bah. I heard that he can be had for a can of beer and bag of pretzels.