Billy, don’t be a hero.
Freekin doogleblints, this thread that was a semi-private requestto Eve for an email, has been seen by more people than most of the other threads on this board.
Advice: If you are really ill for more than a day, go see a Doctor, don’t just wait for it to get better.
(I didn’t do this, and on the third day my appendix whent POP so I ended in Hospital for over a month, when it could have been a two day stay)
Corollary: If you are being chased by any form of weapon wielding badguy, whether he be crazed axe-carrying mask-wearing serial killer, or pistol toting government/mob/mercenary hitman, DO NOT immediately go to the highest point of the building. There is no way to escape from there. If you see stairs or elevators, resist the urge to go UP; always go down.
a dull knife is more dangerous than a sharp one.
Never get involved in a land war in Asia.
That looks infected, I’d get that checked out if I were you.
Go west young man.
Never rub another mans rhubarb.
It’s not normal when it hurts to pee. FYI.
Never whistle while pissing.
If you don’t see the fnords, they can’t eat you.
Ball bearings. It’s ALL ball bearings these days.
Two British Army maxims:
“Hot, sweet, milky tea is a panacea for anything except a stomach wound;” and
“Keep your mouth shut, bowels open, and never volunteer.”
All the doctor wants is “a word.”
My suggestion: ultracrepidarian.
Never light a fart in a pair of polyester pants.
I mean it! Don’t do it!
Always…no, never forget to check your references.
I think the young people enjoy it when I “get down” verbally.
Stranger On a Train, your first post and you quote Real Genius in an obscure thread that took on a life of it’s own shortly after the OP?
Welcome to the boards!
One word…are you listening…?
Plastics
Never go in against a sicilian when death is on the line.
Don’t call up what you can’t put down.
“42”
Cut the red wire! … or, was that the blue one?
Violate all advice given to you at least once, if the result would be amusing and only embarassing.
Do not attempt masturbation with a vaccum cleaner.