Aw, finally we have a nice little throw pillow!
Anyone watch Countdown with Keith Olbermann? I seriously want to have that man’s babies.
The bottom crawl along had me in hysterics.
At least it was a home birth. Well, as much as any birth on Teegeeack can be considered “home”.
Time to send the wee monster to Sea Org.
Nah. Two pounds is considered big. When totnak was born the midwives were oohing and aahing over the one-kilo-on-the-nose placenta. Still, though, when’s the last time you ate a pound and a half of any common meat in one sitting? That’s a big slab of dead flesh, there.
(Yep, midwives/OBs have to look at the placenta. They need to make sure it’s whole, because if anything is left inside it can be dangerous for the new mamma. Did I mention I’m so glad I don’t have to look at placentas every day?)
No it doesn’t.
Right, it doesn’t.
My daughter’s name is Sarah, which means ‘Princess’ in Hebrew. She loves reminding me of this, and then I remind her we’re not Jewish. 
I suppose that technically he’s their guardian. “First-time biological father” isn’t catchy with the press.
I really want to add a bit about her being the moon-child which will bring the entire planet into the state of Clear, or something like that, but I have legitimate articles I don’t want to jeopardize.
Okay, I got another one.
She’s the Suri with the lunatic fringe as her pop!
As for the placenta, let’s go Asian/Fusion…it’s a shame that there was never an Iron Chef Placenta Battle.
Placenta Nigiri
Placenta Tar Tar
Placenta Tataki
Placenta Mousse, with Placenta/Wine Reduction
So, let me see if I got this whole thing about “self control” right…[ul]
[li]Screaming in actual physical pain while giving birth - not OK.[/li][li]Jumping around on a couch like a spastic flea to express how much in love you are - OK.[/li][/ul]
Do I have this right?
No, not right. Those around the pregnant mother are to be quiet. She can yell all she wants.
That sounds less like a little girl and more like a pear tree.
Great, I’m going to be humming that all day.
How long did that take you? 
Well, the birthday parties should be interesting…
I thought it was like this (I could be wrong):
The mother can respond to the pain of childbirth in ways ranging from moaning to screaming, but she is discouraged from using profanity even while enduring the most intense contractions and the birth itself.
My understanding of it comes from an inset within the article in the edition of People magazine that confirmed Katie’s pregnancy (November?). Lisa Remini (a Scientologist) clarified the “silent birth” controversy, describing her experience with it. She said something like: no one expects a woman giving birth to be completely silent, but she should try her best to say as few words as possible (or something like that).
Leah (not Lisa) Remini
That’s funny, I just saw these four guys riding by on big horses with swords and scythes and stuff…
scratches head Weird. Oh, well, back to work.
From here:
It just struck me as funny.
$cienos would never name a child Xenu, since he’s their arch-enemy. It would be like devout Christians naming their child Satan, it would never happen, not even in an effort to “take back the name” because the name of Xenu has only ever existed in one context, something L. Ron Hubbard made up when he came up with the story of Xenu, who, being an intergalactic warlord of sorts who hated overpopulation, gathered up all the lowlifes and criminals, brought them to earth, stuffed them into volcanos, exploded them using H-Bombs, whereupon the souls of all those lowlifes shot out of the volcanos, and now hang in the atmosphere around the entire earth, and, called body thetans, rain down on earth like a fine mist, covering everyone who’s born, and cause all the bad things that happen in the world, and of course, the only way to get rid of them is to use $cientology “auditing” sessions and taking $cientology courses, which cost a lot of money, but even if you get rid of your own, there are all those past lives of yours, all of which have body thetans of their own which you must pay to get rid of, and despite the bundles of money that Xenu is responsible for bringing into $cientology, they’re supposed to hate him because, oooh, he’s a bad guy.
Good luck to the beach ball. Poor thing. All hail Xenu.
Vickie (sorry, on comma overload)