Q: What’s the best time for a dental appointment?
A: tooth-hurty
What did Spock find in the toilet?
The Captain’s log.
Why is a fly called a fly?
Because it flies.
Why is a bee called a bee?
Because it is.
Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
How can you tell an anal and oral thermometer apart?
The taste.
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
Medicine cured my breeder bull’s libido – it tastes like peppermint.
“Knock, knock”
“Come back with a warrant!”
Blind guy walking past a fish market:
“Hello, ladies!” 
… it took a while. I don’t think I’m going to be able to use that one in mixed company …
I had to explain it to a physicist.
Variety review of Popeye starring in Hamlet:
“Iamb! What iamb!”
Why did the moron tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
…
He didn’t want to wake up the sleeping pills. 
How do you distinguish oral thermometers from rectal?
The taste.
What’s wrong with today’s music?
Too much sax and violins.
Q: What do you call a blind German?
A: not see
Psst look up… Post #65
Must be spoken in a Yoda voice:
Why was nine afraid of seven? Because 6, 7 8!
Ah heck. These “active” pages make searching a pain. I did look, honest!
“I’m pink; therefore, I’m Spam.”
—René des à la Carte