AA works fine for people with any or no theological framework. It doesn’t work for people who don’t want to quit drinking. That’s why court-mandated attendance is a problem.
Given the amount of godlessness in this thread, I have to conclude that people’s experiences vary. I’m sorry it wasn’t helpful to you.
The meeting I went to last night hit the “higher power” note quite frequently. Even though I was prepared to be open minded it was still a bit jarring. I’m told other groups are a lot less by the book, so I think it’s worth trying to find one like that (though I am in the Bible Belt, so it could be rough going). It’s got to be helpful, after all you’re not drinking for that hour or two, and you’re with a bunch of people with sobriety skills and goals. I dunno. I’ll give it a fair shot, anyway.
If you want a meeting that has less “higher power” talk I suggest you find a meeting in an affluent area, a luncheon meeting frequented by lawyers and engineers, people with job skills and life skills, people who don’t need to rely on a “higher power” to get a better job or form a new habit/skill.
I know this sounds cynical but it has been my experience… the higher the economic status the less talk of a higher power in the 12 steps.
Interesting idea. I was looking for a lunchtime meeting around where I work anyway . Maybe I’ll find a better fit there.
If you can find a sponsor who is not particularly “into” the higher power thing they can help guide you some.
But don’t even worry about finding a sponsor right now or working the steps or joining AA permanently. Just get a few phone numbers for people you think might be able to help you.
I’d say 1/3 or 1/2 of the 12 step experience is bonding with other people. Statistics do say that the rate of “success” is more or less the same to get sober with or without AA but what those statistics miss - because they do not address - is that for the people who do stay in AA, you will make some of the best friends of your life.
You are right. My apologies.
OK, here’s 24 hours sober under my belt. I was way too hung over yesterday to consider drinking again, so not exactly a white-knuckle challenge. Today I’ll have low grade anxiety all day, but that’s usually manageable. And tonight I will not drink at all.
That’s how you do it.
If you need help managing the anxiety, anti anxiety medications, meditation and/or therapy.
(Anti anxiety meds are addictive, so you don’t want them to be a long term crutch)
If the nervousness/anxiety gets too much, I used Ativan (Lorazepam).
It is a benzodiazepine and should be approached with caution. Think Valium - the original “happy” pill - it is also a benzodiazepine.
At one time or another, I’ve been on about 6 benzo’s, so they are old friends. d
You may not want to get so chummy with them, but they DO work.
Best wishes.
I know this type of anxiety is alcohol-related and goes away if I abstain for 2 days. I’m used to it and It’s actually very mild right now. But I’ll re-evaluate if that changes.
It’s good that you feel that the low-grade anxiety is manageable. One thing they try to emphasize, both in AA and in cognitive therapies is that it’s okay to feel things–good or bad. We get so used to reaching for something to immediately numb us that we forget that feelings are natural. There are many, many non-chemical ways of dealing with anxiety. (Exercise, meditation, talking with a sympathetic person, and so on).
Do yourself a favor and don’t immediately head for medications, especially if you haven’t been honest with your doctor about your drinking. I’ve spent a lot of time in various support groups watching people try to kick their dependence on various benzodiazepene relatives and came away with the conviction that alcohol addiction is a walk in the park by comparison.
I was once in a treatment center many years ago. I met a lady there who was addicted to Valium. Before I ever knew her, I would have thought it was impossible to get addicted to Valium But I witnessed the withdrawl pains that she suffered when she stopped “cold turkey” and - believe it or not - those pains were worse than the pains those suffered by people addicted to most any other kind of drugs. She suffered for 7 days and she suffered more than anyone else I ever saw who was addicted to any other form of drugs or alcohol. It was scary to watch. But I remember her suffering extremely vividly.
The point I’m trying to make is to echo what usedtobe said. Approach Valium or any other form of related benzodiazepine with extreme caution because the withdrawl pains will seriously cause you to suffer to the extreme.
It is very commendable for you to admit you were mistaken and apologize instead of digging in your heels and arguing the point.
Lorazepam is associated with a higher incidence of relapses. As much as I’d love to (I used to take it), I wouldn’t go there.
Speaking of relapsing, AA doesn’t assume that early sobriety will include relapses. We’re just pretty pragmatic about it–some people do, some don’t, all welcome.
Hang in there HMSI!
I’ve heard benzos described as “alcohol in a pill.” It could be like starting to drink again, making you fall into the same pattern, and actually starting to drink, too. Or–if the doctor gives you enough–it could end up like switching one addiction for another.
I’ve been prescribed a small dose of Klonopin for anxiety a couple of times now. When I’ve been dry a couple of weeks I’ll work with my physician to taper off of it, because I don’t think I need it anymore. All the alcohol and meds are just residual coping mechanisms from an intense time that ended about 6 months ago, so it’s time to start getting all this stuff out of my system.
Best wishes, and be strong!
I re-evaluated my alcohol consumption at the turn of the new year. I was drinking 2-4 fairly large Manhattans every night and even though I usually waited until 8pm to pour myself a drink, I found myself getting “itchy” for that first drink at 7:00, and then at 6:00.
I slept like shit, I always had to get up to piss at 3am, and I felt groggy every morning. I decided I’d had enough. Unfortunately, so far, that hasn’t meant that I’ve quit drinking, but I haven’t had any hard alcohol for 28 days and seem to be able to accommodate 1-2 beers a night without the side effects the Manhattans were giving me.
We’ll see what happens in February. I’d like to get away from drinking every day, even if it is just one beer.
Here’s 2 days dry. Feeling well, just a bit sluggish. Saturday date night will be a struggle, my wife drinks moderately on the weekends. I explained that I can’t do that now, at least not for a very long time, and she seemed a little bummed. She doesn’t get that it’s all or nothing right now.
Sorry to hear that. It’s harder (but not impossible) when you aren’t getting support at home and when you have to live with alcohol in the house. It’s everywhere, though, so you may as well get used to it. That’s one reason why having outside support is useful.