It's still not safe to be a woman.

The BBQ Pit
141

Chula i am sorry, but it is you who acted like an idiot here. you had it coming.

the guy acted in a predictable manner, he wanted you, he stated so bluntly (for which he deserves respect imho). at that point, if you didn’t want him you should have cut him off sharply. you didn’t. so what the fuck do you want now ?

so he called you a whore, but since you kept talking to him even after that i guess it DOES make you a whore. and the fact that you didn’t know what you were doing makes you a stupid bitch on top of that.

law school ? jesus.

142

vasyachkin you’re an asshole. An ignorant, stunned asshole.

I hope your camel gets hump hives.

Jerk.

143

CofC v. Vasy

Dumb v. Dumber

144

Okay, this made no sense whatsoever.

145

I started it? How old are you?

146

I have enjoyed this thread immensely – from the hypobolic title, through indignant, self-proclaimed victimhood, to the whiny, bitchy minor flame-war. Brilliant.

I’m surprised that it takes three pages to suggest that chula should hang out in better bars and consider buying her own drinks.

147

In fact, its such a big strawman Christopher Lee is dancing around it while Edward Woodward is inside it screaming “I am a Christian!”

148

Three pages into this thread and it’s obvious that Jack Batty summed it up back in the very first response when he said, “Tune in tomorrow for another exciting episode of Alcoholic Theater.”

The dude was a total asshat. The world is full of total asshats and, in bars, those asshats tend to be drunk which just exacerbates their asshatitude. Chula, IMO, was somewhat clueless in her response to the dude’s asshatitude. The world is also full of clueless people and, in bars, those clueless people tend to be drunk which exacerbates their cluelessness.

Asshat + Clueless Person + Alcohol = Alcoholic Theater

It’s a simple equation, really. Personally, I agree with the poster who said that the person who really dropped the ball was the bartender. She should have ejected the Asshat when he started hollering, “Whore!” Doesn’t this bar have a bouncer? Sounds like it needs one. Or, lacking a bouncer, the cops should have been called.

149

Thank God. I thought I was the only one!

150

I keep hoping chula stops back in to ask a mod to close this thread, as it keeps popping up once a week to remind her how little support she got on her OP, how ill judged many people think her own behavior was, and is now off track and on some strange weekly flame cron job with no additional insight into chula’s original rant.

Some threads are meant to just die off. (And yes, I realize the irony of posting to one on those and breathing additional life into it).

151

So does talking to strangers…
:wink:

152

BTW, I’m not using my current condition as an excuse for flaming others. Just for why I’ve been really active on the boards as of late.

That’s all. :wink:

153

Alcoholic Theatre presents
Called to the Bar.
In Act 2, scene 3, a dejected Lothario muses deeply about life and its meaning:

"Let’s see. I’m sitting in my local bar, and notice this girl. I’ve had a few drinks and so I go over and offer to buy a drink. She accepts it, and we talk about this and that and…uh…I dunno what exactly. But she was boasting about law school or somethin’. I have no idea. All I noticed was her fleshy lips and spunky attitude. I can see she likes me.

Most girls tell me to get lost in, like, 5 minutes. Tops. I admit I’m a dickwad drunk. But she keeps arguing with me, so I’m thinking “Hey, this chick is marriage material!”

So I tell her I like her. She mentions that I’m drunk, which is true, so I can tell she’s really paying attention to my feelings. I put my hand on her leg and she starts insulting my mother. WTF??? I was so mad I called her a whore, but then I apologized and left her alone. Yeah I’m a jerk, but leave my mother out of it, awright?

So I’m minding my own business, talking with friends. This same law babe comes over and asks me for a cigarette. “No way!” I said. So she harangues me about why not. Maybe because you’re a bitch and will sue me for enabling your lung cancer in 20 years? But I don’t say that. I jus’ like, think it. I walk away from her. At this point she doesn’t realize I’m doing her a favor.

After a while she comes over again and tries to bum another cigarette! What part of NO didn’t you understand, lady? Don’t they teach you that NO means NO in tort school? She says she’s sorry for hurting my feelings – I figure, yeah sure you are, let’s bury the hatchet, just don’t bury it in my head, sweetcheeks.

So it’s closing time and it’s just me, the girl, and the bartender. I figure I’ll be a gentleman and walk the girl home. That’s what gentlemen are supposed to do these days, right? She tells me to forget it. So I exit.

But I left a $20 bill behind, so I go back for it. I overhear Missy lawyer and the bartender talking about what an asshat I am. Which is true. I’m drunk. It’s 5 AM. Anyone who spends all night at a bar like that is a loser. But I figure I’m not the only asshat with them around to keep me company.

Anyway, I woke up at noon in my backyard. No idea how I got there. I’m just glad I didn’t get beaten up or something. I still think she liked me."

154

FranticMad:

:::applause:::

155

Yikes, I thought this thread had died off! The reactions I got in this thread were almost enough to make me leave the SDMB completely. But with the current state of the world, there’s just too much that needs to be talked about. I then thought of writing a long analysis of how the high standards that are generally prevalent on this board go out the window in the Pit. (For example, it would be nice if people refrained from substituting their imaginations for facts, even in the Pit.) I am consoled by the fact that in real life, no one seems to feel that there was anything wrong with my behavior. It makes me wonder whether people here or so completely different from the people I come into contact with in my life, or whether these reactions are attributable to the dynamics of the board.
Frantic, your story is perfectly fine and amusing except for one thing: You’re buying into the false rumor started somewhere on this thread that I ever approached the guy. I can’t call in any witnesses, as none of them are Dopers, so you’ll have to take my word for it.

I definitely don’t see any reason for this thread to go on.

156

**Chula,

From the op:

I’d suggest you give it the fuck up. Now you’re just looking like an idiot. More.

157

Are you asking that the thread be closed or are you just lamenting its continuance? Because if you want the mods to close the thread, I don’t think you made that very clear.

158

Missy, as I said before, the guy came over, sat down right next to me, and stared at me. Since ignoring him did not make him leave me alone, I thought speaking to him might diffuse the situation. Once again, I did not approach him; he approached me.

In retrospect, I wouldn’t have done anything different. Except I wouldn’t have talked to him in the first place, but at that point I had no way of knowing that he was a bad drunk. Once he went off the deep end, I don’t believe anything I did contributed to his behavior, and the people who were there don’t think so either.

Since no one in real life thinks I fucked up, and no one would think of saying I was clueless about handling these types of situations (quite the opposite), I’m going to be left puzzled about what went on in this thread. On a positive note, this serves to remind me that I need to spend more time and energy on things going on in real life.

Close this thread? Yes, of course.

159

So long as you think this, you will be doomed to the syndicated reruns of Drunkchick Theatre.

I’m not surprised your friends think you did nothing wrong; they’re you’re friends. It makes them a little biased.

Maybe some day you’ll realize that asking him for a cigarette not once, but twice, extended and prolonged an encounter after it went bad and that had you not done that, things would not have degraded as much as they did.

Until then you’ll probably continue to rant and rave about how a couple of drunk people in a bar indicate something about the general state of the world and pretty much look like an ass with your woe-is-me-I’m-a-woman-so-I’m-a-victim song and dance.

I’m hoping you learn and grow, but not so hopeful I’d put money on it.

160

Ya know, if we have all gotten the wrong impression of what went on in the bar and how you and the bartender dealt with the situation, maybe the problem is your failure in putting it in words.

From what I have read here, I could name quite a few things you did wrong that night and how he wasn’t the only bad drunk, but since you have asked for the thread to be closed I won’t.