Thread over…
That sounds like a reasonable approach. In my experience with sort-of Confucian culture, there may be two things at play: (1) in a patrician society, how can dad tell his daughter that he loves her and is worried about her, without descending from the lofty perch society demands of him; and (2) how he can avoid humiliation or looking like a failure for not bringing his daughter up right, either in his own eyes or those of his family & coworkers.
For point (2), I think it might be best to give some public indications of your plans as quickly as possible.
I’m sure you enjoyed posting that, but it’s not clear to me how you think it’d be anything but hurtful to the OP.
I see CrafterMan’s point, though. No matter what you might intend in saying that, you need to take into consideration what the dad is going to hear as you say it. Since AFAIK Korean and Japanese culture both regard foreign cultural influences as less than benign, HZN would still be inviting her dad to blame himself for her downfall, as it were.
I think I’ll refrain from using the words “cock” and “cum” when conversing with my dad, much as the thought amuses me. 
Time for everyone involved to sit down for a good old fashioned viewing of “Fiddler on the Roof”. That is how it is done in my ethnicity. After that, I promise you will only need to sing the title of “Sunrise Sunset” should the situation ever arise again.
Calling your children whores or sluts is not unusual in Asian cultures. Actually, I suspect it’s rather recent and rare that pre-martial sex has become acceptable in the US. If you watch Asian tv shows or movies, you can get labeled a whore/slut for going out on an unchaperoned date or coming home minutes after your curfew.
My advice is that you need to understand that your parents and you have different cultures, cultural values, norms, and rules. That they use one set hurts you because you are using a different set. Imho, in the US today, I think any woman would be unmarriable if they didn’t have pre-marital sex with their prospective suitor. On the other hand, in most Asian countries, virginity is still required in females for marriage.
The advice above, imho, won’t help. If you treat your parents like an American would, it wouldn’t work because they aren’t American. Conversely, trying to accept their point of view won’t work for you because you are.
Imho, the only thing you can possibly do is not feel hurt because of these cultural clashes. Understand that you and your parents have completely different points of view that are, in the case of pre-marital sex, polar opposites.
Well, what is the problem exactly, from his point of view?
That you’re living with a man who’s not your papered-over husband? That he’s a different religion? A different color? Would it be all right if you were engaged but not yet papered-over?
You do intend to marry at some point, probably, likely, “if authorities allow it and weather permits”(1), but right now you both still feel it’s too early. Spanish doesn’t even have a different word for “boyfriend”, “fiancée” and “groom”, they’re all “novio”, so I’m afraid that’s a detail I can’t get worked up about; I do understand it’s a big deal in Parts Elsewhere, though. How much of a big deal is the ring with the little rock, and how much the golden band, for your dad?
Also and related, how long would people stay engaged in Ireland? In Spain it’s usually a matter of months between “setting the date” and the actual wedding, and if the venue isn’t a difficult one to get it can be weeks: on the other hand, in these boards I’ve heard of people being engaged for years. If your boyfriend thinks of engagement as I think of “setting the date”, then he won’t want to ask you until he’s truly ready to wrap up the paperwork, but if being engaged would make the sun rise for your parents without being an actual “OMGwe’regettingmarriedNOW” thing… maybe he should think about it.
If it’s because of color or religion… then the only appropriate response is along the lines of “:rolleyes: I love you too, Daddy…” (try not to make the rolleyes too evident).
The approach you’re taking sounds good to me, as it lets your parents know that he really has the level of compromise they want. So, he’s asking for your hand in advance, eh?
(1) direct translation from Spanish, where this line is often used in announcements for outdoors events.
Really? I’m Korean (read: not Korean American) and this is news to me. Is there a specific Asian culture you have in mind?
I’m a Korean woman (grew up here and everything) and it’s not news to me. Although attitudes towards sexuality have relaxed somewhat, there’s a reason hymen reconstruction surgery exists in this country. Upper-middle class girls are still expected to at least keep up the appearance of staying a virgin before they get married. Or at least engaged.
Really? Name three, if you please – certainly noplace in the Sinosphere, to my knowledge. But if you leave that little bit out . . .
The surgery you’re referring to is available across the world, including the US. I don’t think that says anything unless there’s some data that indicates it’s more common in Korea.
I will say that Korean society is generally more conservative and more concerned ‘keeping up appearances’, but there’s hardly the fixation on virginity found in more religious cultures.
I’d even say that the average korean parent is far less concerned about their childrens’ sex lives than most religious parents in the States.
Well, we’ll have to agree to disagree, then. Korea may be less fixated on an unmarried woman’s virginity than say, Iran, but it’s still not considered okay for girls to be having sex before marriage. I should know, I’m a Korean girl, and most of my friends are also Korean girls. I know plenty of girls my age (29) who are still virgins, or at least claim to be.
That doesn’t mean Korean girls don’t have sex - God knows the love motels around here have a booming business. But it’s not really considered acceptable for the most part. A lot of parents may look the other way rather than make a big deal out of it though.
It sounds to me like you two are saying pretty much the same thing.
Could we get a definition of “Asian” here? Chaperoned Etc.
Korea is much more conservative than Japan, where although it’s not as open for as most people as many parts of the States, no one really bats an eye these days.
Of course you see CrafterMan’s point. Because you are making the same mistake. No one actually expects Hazel to say any of this crap to her father. There is no requirement that all posts in this thread have to be constructive advice.
As for the rest of your post, that would be the point. The Dad did something wrong, so the comment is how to punish him. He deserves to be hurt because he hurt his daughter. Fortunately, his daughter apparently loves him and is willing to forgive rather than punish.
People like to try to punish people that hurt them, just like you did by getting all condescending towards people for getting their anger out rather than helping the OP.
What can I say, but bless yore heart . . .
Yes I think HazelNutCoffee agrees that Superhal’s (somewhat dubious) assertion that female virginity is required for marriage in most of Asia does not, at the very least, apply to Korea. 
Throw his ass right under the bus for it.
" What you said the other night was incredibly hurtful, bigoted, and small minded. I never expected that kind of behaviour from you. I am very hurt and disappointed in you."
Let him stew on that guilt trip for a while.
“Fuck off”
I would tell him that my sex life is none of his goddamned business and then I would either hang up on him or stalk out, whichever applies.
Later, when he sobered up, I’d give him a call and unleash a tirade about slut shaming with both barrels. Sluts deserve love too. There’s nothing wrong with having sex with someone you love. That doesn’t make you a slut.