Your top and bottom five most successful OPs

In My Humble Opinion
1

A bit of a chore to get these results, but easy enough if you go to “Advanced Search,” search for Username/All Threads Started By, and specify that results be returned in descending (or ascending) order.

My top five threads:

Here I am, minty green. Something you want to say? [The turdburglar thread]: 316 replies.
_____, the poor man’s _____: 210 replies.
Personal beliefs based on an appeal to authority . . . in science?: 194 replies
Has anyone dared to suggest that 9/11 shouldn’t have been that big of a deal?: 170 replies
Painful confession time: Things you ought to know but don’t: 169 replies

And my bottom threads, all with zero replies. I thought I’d parse out GQ and ATMB threads, since a lot of them are “question answered, thanks!” Not bothering to link, cause that’s a lot of work:

HA! HA! HA! Don’t you love it when you gum up the works like this?
Ever use a pen scanner?
Verbal tics of corporate cheeseballs: saying “thanks” in reponse to a question
Shine (movie with Geoffrey Rush): what kind of illness did he have?
If the song is by _____ (and _____) then it’s really about _____
Have we ever had a Juiceman appreciation thread?
Did Dr. Conrad Murray sell his soul to the devil? (Michael Jackson related)

Yes, I’m bored.

2

I’ll go with just top and bottom, since I don’t have that many.

If your board name was a food…

And worst… Do you have a hard time waking up from dreams?

3

Damn, I was hoping this thread would be one of Koxinga’s “zeros.”

4

My most successful is Obvious things about a creative work you realize after the millionth time. Someone posted “the SDMB ought to grant it a special “Jason Voorhees” award”)

I’ve had way too many threads with 0 replies.

5

OK, I’ll play. Top five:

  1. Unethical drug dealers are killing Amy Winehouse! (62 replies)
  2. Recommend a cell phone for a thirteen-year-old (53 replies)
  3. Not your ordinary Pit material, I guess (42 replies)
  4. OK, how ought one start this conversation? (35 replies)
  5. Catwoman (30 replies)

Bottom five:

  1. Something new for me to celebrate on Pearl Harbor day (0 replies)
  2. Recommend a starter book on SSIS (0 replies)
  3. Elevated petroleum tanks (0 replies) (!! 335 views and 0 replies? But that’s an awesome story! Eh, maybe you just had to be there.)
  4. Who’s watching the Smallville finale? (2 replies–both from cosmodan, so I guess the answer to the question in the OP was “virtually nobody”)
  5. Cecil’s research methods (3 replies)

So, there you go … I’m not sure what any of this says about me or the board, honestly.

6

Top five:

Leno/Conan Shakeup at NBC - 807 replies
JamieMcGarry - Wheel yourself on down here - 783 replies (Pit thread)

Poll: Mad Men - “Shut the Door” (Spoilers After Airing) - 292 replies

Poll: Are you attracted to competitive bodybuilders? - 189 replies
Isaac Hayes quits South Park - 151 replies

Bottom five: (Not bothering to link, but funny that I had exactly five posts w/ zero replies… perfect for this thread.)

New Gig for Chuck Todd - 0 replies
Time Travel Theoretical (Inspired by Onion) - 0 replies
Lollapalooza 2009 headliners leaked - 0 replies
Help w/ 80’s TV special - Comic strips come to life? - 0 replies
Anyone here use PhotoShelter? - 0 replies

7

Embarrassing, that is. My most successful thread was an accidental one:

Mornington Crescent question.

I’ve had 7 with zero replies.

8

Somali Pirates Seize US Crew – Is It On? (374 replies)
Reagan on the $10? (92)
It’s a classic, but all you NEED to see… (87)
Dennis Miller on the Daily Show (76)
Is the interior of Antarctica knee-deep in dead penguins? (76)

Bradley Effect & Automated Polling (1)
Highest Ranking Government Marriage (1)
Foreign Language Teaching Software (0)
Chicago Polonia (0)
Any News on Onion Vol 19? (0)

9

My top 5:
Doper Diplomacy - Fall and Winter 2002 (726 replies, MPSIMS (pre-Game Room), last post 02-02-2003)
Handicap the GOP nomination race (458 replies, GD, last post 02-10-2008)
Al Qaqaa: where the roadside bombs come from (441 replies, GD, last post 11-07-2004)
Time to Kiss Habeas Corpus Goodbye (407 replies, BBQ Pit, last post 10-02-2006)
Polycarp will be offline indefinitely :frowning: (393 replies, MPSIMS, last post 01-19-2003)

I’ve started 10 threads that got no replies, including “Any Louisville Dopers?” I guess there weren’t any yet in May 2000. Other greatest non-hits included “R.I.P. William Sloane Coffin,” “Dave Johnson’s Curse Rides Again: O’s Under .500 14 Years In A Row,” “Last Thomas Covenant Trilogy, Book 1: The Runes of the Earth,” and ““Son of Osama” captured? - sequel fans everywhere rejoice!”

10

I’ll get the bad news out of the way first: Bottom 5-most recent with 1 or 0 replies(overall I have an even dozen with 0 replies):

Share your Marathon dream stories: 1 reply.

People here love to discuss their dreams, so I thought I’d get to hear about those kinds of dreams that seem to drag on for eons (as in your time sense while sleeping is seriously skewed). I guess not.

Songs you think would make great theme songs for film/TV- 0 replies.

Another surprise-not a single person out of 419 could name a song they would use for a film or TV series?

Super-Earths and powered flight as we know it- 0 replies.

Not a single science geek wanted to chime in about how hard airplanes would be to design/fly in a high-gravity world? :dubious:

Things you thought were mundane and pointless, but (as it turned out) most certainly weren’t 1 reply.

Got me on this one-far too vague a topic.

Stories of your pet being a hero 1 reply.

This is the one that slays me-got one snarky reply, and that was it; thought for sure it would be a multi-pager. What really killed me is that someone else started a virtually identical thread a month or so later which did get 2-3 pages worth of replies. :frowning: But to be fair this super-genius did start his on Thanksgiving Day… :smack:

There were several older ones which also mystified me with their crickets, but oh well.

Top 5 (overall):

I hereby pit the gang of hypocritical deniers “debating” GIGObuster 554 replies.

And they just went on obliviously demonstrating why I Pitted them in the first place.

Favorite products which have mysteriously vanished from store shelves 313 replies.

Now that’s more like it. :cool:

Poster’s names which go great together! 161 replies.

A lot of fun, even tho it has been done before (and since)

Dead giveaways in a post that a person is from country X 159 replies.

Such as “whilst” indicating that someone is British…

The Great Freeze-Out (US weather) 155 replies.

During a severe cold wave early last year.

11

I’ll go with Top 3

Goblins webcomic discussion with 258 and counting
Harry Potter reactions 85 (the first movie - still haven’t read the books)

Poll: U.S. Dopers, are cot / caught pronounced the same to you? 81

Bottom 2 with 1 reply each
Finals are over
Terry Brooks appreciation (or bashing) thread

Bonus: I get credit for starting the very first Firefly thread

12

Mine:

Banner ads? You’re kidding, right? 623 replies

Men - Does it bother you that everybody assumes you’re a child molester? 293 replies

So I guess I’m breaking up with my boyfiend. 284 replies

New! SDMB Slob Reform Club, January Resolution Edition 271 replies

What movies or books do you take the “wrong” thing away from? 228 replies

I have seven threads with no replies, none of which are interesting at all. Rather surprised that I didn’t get anything on “Post your freezer recipes”, though.

13

My top thread I believe is a Top 10 for SDMB of all time:

Word Association Thread! Word Association Thread! - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board 2,989 replies and 12,932 views

What the hell is going on? Some weird things you’ve noticed about TV shows. What the hell is going on? Some weird things you've noticed about TV shows. - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board 158 replies and 3,691 views

The “Good Ol’ Days” weren’t so good. The "Good Ol' Days" weren't so good. - Great Debates - Straight Dope Message Board 105 replies and 2,239 views

Not proud of this one (but it was in response to people who couldn’t tolerate me not caring for movies): You wanna know how to watch that DVD? Shove it up your widescreen ass. You wanna know how to watch that DVD? Shove it up your widescreen ass. - The BBQ Pit - Straight Dope Message Board 144 replies and 4,792 views

I was married for _____ years, and my ex could never understand that _____. I was married for _____ years, and my ex could never understand that _____. - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board 113replies and 7,364 views

.

14

Wow. That was an eye opener.

Despite having been here since 1999, I have started just eleven threads. That’s less than one a year.

15

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Top 5

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Thread / Thread Starter Last Post Replies Views Forum

Malapropagation (Thread 3 of game – #1 with New Name) ( 1 2 3 4 5 6 … Last Page)
Zeldar 04-30-2008 09:38 PM
by kunilou 394 3,305 The Game Room

This thread is just about this thread ( 1 2 3 4 5 6)
Zeldar 09-23-2003 12:03 PM
by Zeldar 290 4,518 Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)

Botticelli – Round 3 ( 1 2 3 4 5 6)
Zeldar 03-19-2007 12:16 PM
by Johnny L.A. 277 1,893 Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)

College football fans: how’s your team look? – 2011 Version ( 1 2 3 4 5 6)
Zeldar Yesterday 01:25 PM
by Ponch8 275 6,023 The Game Room

Non-USA Dopers: Stand and be counted. Please. - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board
Non-USA Dopers: Stand and be counted. Please. ( 1 2 3 4 5 6)
Zeldar 10-25-2006 03:50 AM
by ScareyFaerie 256 6,403 In My Humble Opinion

First 5 zero-replies of 29

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Thread / Thread Starter Last Post Replies Views Forum

Dayton Allen
Zeldar 06-12-2010 11:08 AM
by Zeldar 0 1,604 Cafe Society

Apropos of nothing
Zeldar 12-22-2005 11:42 AM
by Zeldar 0 232 Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)

Move a letter, make a new word – game
Zeldar 04-13-2007 08:32 AM
by Zeldar 0 289 Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)

Origin of the expression “origin of the expression”
Zeldar 04-14-2007 11:05 AM
by Zeldar 0 109 Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)

How about other poems like this one?
Zeldar 07-29-2011 10:01 AM
by Zeldar 0 172 Cafe Society

16

My top 5:

Non-U.S. Dopers: What Are Typical “American” Traits?

Cast the SDMB movie

Worst lyrics in rock/pop music

Arrested Development 11/07

Prince vs. Michael Jackson

Bottom 5 (not counting locked threads):

What’s the best song off of “Accelerate”?

Marinade for carne asada?

Robyn Hitchcock “You & Oblivion” - Need (Geeky) Help

What’s the best song off of “Around the Sun”?

I don’t mind being a dick, so…

17

My top 5:

The 100 Most Influential People - Try the Third, 711 replies, Game Room.
So, just what was Jesus’ message?, 315 replies, Great Debates.
What is the dumbest thing you’ve heard anybody say?, 270 replies, The BBQ Pit
How did the Democratic Party blow this election as badly as they did? How??, 212 replies, Great Debates
What is the single best episode of any TV series that you have ever seen?, 168 replies, Cafe Society.

… and 8 additional threads with 100 or more replies.

On the other hand, I have 59 threads with fewer than 10 responses, you bastards. :stuck_out_tongue: Among the lowlights, are the following threads I started (6) with 0 responses:

Author/film/etc. slogans…, Cafe Society (I actually thought this one would be popular, stupid me.
How would I go about finding Doctor Who props, Cafe Society. BTW, found one!
[Help me find a thread, please - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board]Help me find a thread, please](Help me find a thread, please), MPSIMS.
Question(s) regarding college athletes and sports agency., Game Room.
The Greatest Game Ever Played, Game Room (About an ESPN show about a football game).
The SDMB Baby Picture Thread!, MPSIMS. All right, I admit this one was to brag about my beautiful little girl. But 0 replies? :frowning:

Any attempts to rescue these threads from the ignominy of having 0 replies will be greatly appreciated. :stuck_out_tongue:

18

Proper link: Help me find a thread, please - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board

19

It’s not the thread that got the most replies, but I think my most successful one was I do not like the hospital robot because I had the most fun with it. (there was a nice followup, Robot retirement party).

Several threads I started crashed and burned with no replies, including one where I insulted Paul Harvey.

20

By far my most successful thread was: Ask the Adult Child of a Hoarder/Clutterer
0 replies to Operation Find Don.